Anniversaries

There were a few 'milestone anniversaries' celebrated in our family this past weekend. As a group of us were together, trying to figure out which anniversary was being celebrated in one of the cases we decided to round up to the nearest 'five' because it isn't often that one celebrates a ''34th'' anniversary. I declared if I could make it 2 years in a marriage, I would celebrate.

Marriage is a work in progress. As each of these couples celebrated the milestone that they made, I couldn't help thinking of the occasions that were worthy of celebrating as they made it through each one of those years.

Simply adjusting to marriage, living with someone and learning to accept all of those little nuances that you don't really know about a person until you live with them 24/7 is the first breakthrough. I've lived on my own for so many years now, that it is almost incomprehesible to think of the idea of someone 'fitting into my life' and vice versa. One of the advantages of marrying young may be that you are still quite willing and able to change and adapt as necessary. But no matter how and when you marry ... it is an adjustment. 'Til death do you part is a long time.

There are matters of running the house, social lives (independent and together), finances, in laws, family and expectations of what one expects of the other in marriage. Many, many puzzle pieces to fit together and find out what works out best for both parties. And the puzzle just continues to grow with the years.

Add children into the family and there is a completely new dynamic. A dependent, changing roles and expectations redefines a couple and once again there is a need to add this to the ever changing puzzle and challenge of marriage.

Life throws curve balls you all of the time. One never knows what is around the next corner and how each individual will react to it. I don't think that there is a marriage that exists that hasn't had to overcome obstacles that could make or break the relationship. How one gets through the tough times is critical to what direction their marriage takes from there.

I have little hands on experience with marriage. The relationships that I've had, have taught me a lot about myself and what I need to work on. I look at the marriages all around me that have weathered the storms of life and remain solid and I see so many qualities within those married couples that I admire.

As the children of one of these couples put together a program that celebrated the marriage of their parents and the home that this couple created for their young children, my heart swelled with joy. I could only watch the faces of the couple who were being celebrated as their lives unfolded in front of them in the form of stories, poems, songs and a picture slideshow that helped the audience feel the joy and moments of celebration each step along the way.

Yes - this was a landmark celebration worthy of taking note of and shouting from the rooftops. But each small step along the way that led them to this day was equally worthy of rejoicing in.

I look at this marriage, their children and the home that each one of these children is building with their young families and I honor each moment and circumstance that has created the foundation that they are building on to this day ...