Sunday, July 21, 2013

I Cleaned a Room ... and I Think I Liked It!

It all started when I moved everything related to my dad's family's collection-of-memories into my temporary office (aka - Hotel Oasis) for my solitary 'closed door' holiday at home ...

I had a picnic cooler full of books, research, notes, etc in my bedroom. On top of that, was a binder where I had a printed copy of everything-I-have-written to date. Beside and on top of that?? Well ... that is the beginning of today's tale.

Clearing out those two family-history-related objects from the corner of my bedroom started a chain reaction of events.

One thing led to another ... and another ... and another.

My dresser tops are (almost) clean of clutter, debris and (yes!!!) even dust. I got rid of the pile of unread books on the floor beside my bed and filed them on top of a book shelf in another location. I found a spot for some unused Christmas gift ideas to save for another year. I finally filed the stack of 2012 Christmas cards and photos away...

Then I opened my closet.

At first, I could only deal with that-which-was-on-the-floor. This led to a willingness to let go of that which is only a good memory, when I came upon my first pair of ballroom dance shoes which were worn well past their expiry date. And the pair of ill-fitting shoes that followed those ones. Worn out shoes. Shoes that will never fit me. Let them go, girl ... let them go.

So I did.

Then I came back at my closet the next day and looked at the massive amount of space that ball gowns (that will never fit me again) were taking up. And the massive array of outdated and (now) too small glittery, sparkly tops that I wore when I danced. The Latin costumes that will never see the light of day again. The practice skirts that are far too small ...

I kept a few dance-related items, put the rest in a garment bag and placed them on a clothes rack downstairs along with my ill-fitting dance shoes. I could should sell these items. One day ...

Then ... I was ready to deal with the remainder of my closet. I cannot tell you how many times I have faced that closet and not been willing to let things go. Once I 'filed away' my dance wear, I was ready to deal with the rest.

I now walk into my room and I don't feel burdened by that which was taking up space everywhere I look in my room. Then ... I open my closet doors and I feel free. I am letting go. I am not holding onto items for dear life. When I let some things go ... it opens up room to allow for something new to enter.

I'm not talking about clothes now. I'm talking about 'life'.

When all of the nooks and crannies of your being are clinging on and holding on tightly to dear memories of the past ... you don't have room to let in the future. We don't have to throw away those good memories. We can carefully package them up and simply put them in a carefully selected spot. For now.

'Stuff' doesn't matter. Memories do. 'Stuff' takes up too much space. Memories are a gift that waft in and out of our days like a gentle breeze. 'Stuff' can begin to suffocate you if you let things grow. Memories are gentle reminders that will remain long after the 'stuff' is gone ...

I cannot believe how much lighter I feel. Simply by cleaning out my room. The clutter, the excess, the inability to let go was weighing me down.

I cleaned a room ... and I think I liked it!

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