Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Variable Cloudiness

The world has felt like so very many shades of blue since I turned the calendar page and found myself in 2015.

I lost my rose colored glasses and this new pair with a hue of blue was not a good fit.

I tried to adjust my focus and figure out how to make them work but no matter what I did, I could not see through the blueness.

I appreciate the perspective I got as I walked through my days. I got to "try on some new shoes" and walk a few miles in them.

The shoes did fit, because they were mine. But I didn't like the way I felt in them. Blue suede shoes are not for me.

My entire world felt 50 Shades of Blue. I lost my joy. Little things didn't matter in the way they used to light up my world. 

I couldn't invite people into the darkness with me. I didn't have the energy to try. I didn't want to be around anyone. I just wanted to burrow under the covers of "blue" and feel what I was feeling until I did not feel it anymore.

Waking up in the morning was hard. Oh! So! Hard!

I went through the paces. I found comfort within family. Blanketed in the comfort of family, the hues of blue lightened. I thought I could get used to this shade of powder blue if I had to. But it was hard when they weren't around. 

One day turned into the next. Some days were navy. Others were teal. There was a splash of periwinkle. No matter what color the day was, it was haunted by a tinge of blue.

I couldn't shake it. 

I am not exactly sure how I would have managed if life would have happened any other way. I know I would have been okay. Eventually. 

But as life would have it, those blue tinged glasses were tossed aside a few days ago. I can see clearly once again.

My lenses are clear now. It is much easier to focus. They aren't rose colored but that's okay.

I wouldn't mind a pair of rose colored glasses to wear some of the time. Perhaps one's eyesight gets skewed when you look through them for prolonged periods. 

Life is a little of "rose" intermixed with "blue". Add a shot of clarity from time to time and I think you may end up with a shade of purple, depending on the hues of each color tossed into the mix.

Real life is hard some times. But it isn't always hard.

Real life is easy some of the time. But it isn't always easy.

Real life is tedious, repetitive and many shades of gray.

Real life is many shades of confusion, sprinkled with lessons, heartache, joy, ecstasy and contentment.

Real life is every shade of the rainbow. It is never black or white.

My life is feeling a like a shade of lavender today. It isn't all roses and sunshine. But the shades of blues are lightening. 

Sunshine and blue skies are on the horizon. Clouds are in the forecast. Presently "A few clouds"; "Variable cloudiness" later this morning; followed with "Sunny with cloudy periods" this afternoon; and "Variable cloudiness" throughout the evening.

That's life. It changes like the weather. Thankfully our weather does change. I was ready for a change...

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