I have been wondering why my word well has run dry. I scrolled through my Facebook feed this morning craving inspiration. I found so many perfect quotes that I saved and filed away to send off to the right person, at the right time one day. Then I stumbled across this:
"Sometimes you have to die a little on the inside in order to be reborn and rise again as a stronger, smarter version of you." ~Unknown
It was as if a flash light shone into my soul and said "That's it!! That is why you have nothing to write about!"
I've been living the "Life of Riley" here lately. Yes, there are a few little blips on the radar but nothing has been getting under my skin and causing an irritation or "rash" of emotion.
For some odd reason, I am riding a wave of ease and comfort at the moment. The sea is pretty calm and the odd wave just keeps things interesting.
My biggest personal challenge of feeling "stuck and overwhelmed" feels like it has been overcome with the assistance of a little muscle power, tools and know-how from others, followed up some paint and a paint brush of my own.
No, I haven't taken up painting pictures but I have discovered I have the ability to wield a paint brush and cover up the many flaws and imperfections within our home.
I seemed to need a nudge in the right direction and hiring someone to start the ball rolling was worth every penny spent.
One repair or fix-up job seems to beget another and I have a few more "professionals" I would like to hire to start me down the next road or two. This is the part where an endless supply of funding would be nice.
But boundaries are good.
Without boundaries, there would be too much to do, too much to decide and simply "too much". I like my life just the way it is.
Living a modest little life, within a modest little home that I can afford suits me just fine. I don't want "more", I simply want all that I have to be in good repair and in working order.
I have been dwelling on the excesses I have accumulated within this modest little home and although that is/was a big part of my state of feeling overwhelmed it wasn't everything.
A few cans of paint have lifted me up and out of the state of feeling "I can't do it all!" into a place where I have realized what a difference a coat of paint can make.
Paint can't fix that which is broken but if what you have has "good bones", a coat of paint can rejuvenate a room in a way which no one else in the world may notice. That has made the world of difference to me.
The words of my professional painter/handyman/jack-of-all-trades continue to run through my mind. He sounded like he was trying to emulate one of the contractors on the Home and Garden Network. He was going on and on about what I was doing was not increasing the market value of our home. It was as if he thought I was wasting good money after bad to simply provide a cosmetic makeover instead of a full on rip out and start all over renovation.
I don't want to rip everything and start all over. In no aspect of my life am I looking for a full-on renovation. Whether it is my home, my family, my friends or my body. I do not want to start all over again. I simply want to take care of what I have and keep it in good running order.
It is amazing what a coat of paint can do for a person. It isn't must my home that I am feeling better about, it is "life" itself.
I am happy with my modest little life-as-I-know-it. I plan to continue to nurture that-which-I-have in order to keep what is working for me. The clutter must still be dealt with but it is so much easier to see what is excessive and unnecessary with that fresh coat of paint to contrast and compare "the old and dishevelled" with the "used and improved".
I hope to keep that paint brush moving and improving things around here. There are an awful lot of nooks and crannies to contend with. The excess will find its way out the door as I move through the house. All in good time.
"Sometimes your surroundings have to overwhelm you a little in order to be reborn and rise again as a cleaner, more organized and better working version of the way they were before." ~Me