I was digging deep to answer some of the questions in the "Living Brave" course I am working through. We are four chapters into the book "Rising Strong", which is about picking yourself up after a fall (and so much more).
I had to go back many decades to unearth when I was going through the questions on "offloading hurt". The more questions I answered, the further back I had to go. As I worked my way through the lesson I realized the times I got back up again after a fall were when life came into focus, I realigned myself with new goals and I grew.
I have been stagnant for a lot of years. The most traumatic event was a bad work experience four years ago. There is a small part of me that still hurts when I unearth this experience but 99% of my thoughts pertain to the lessons learned and the compassion I gained. Each and every time I use this experience to tell a story I almost always end with, "It was a very good lesson for me."
I have moved on since then. I'm still incredibly gun shy about ever working outside of my home again so I suppose I gained a battle scar that still hurts when the weather changes. But all in all, I have moved beyond this little glitch in my story.
I was sitting still with these thoughts, thinking "I need a crisis in my life to create a need to push me out of this comfortable spot and back into the arena of 'living' again..." when I picked up the phone and talked with a friend.
It wasn't divine timing, yet it was. We had arranged to have time for a "phone visit" a week ago. The timing of that call just happened to be when I was focusing on the growth that always came after a fall, when I talked with her.
This friend has been through a lot the past few years. The second last time I spoke with her, she sounded defeated. I have never ever heard defeat in her voice before. It scared me. Then we spoke at Christmas time and she had a plan. She was in the process of signing up to attend the Hoffman Institute. The Hoffman Process was exactly what she needed to pick herself up and be in a place where she was ready to answer the question "Where do I go from here??"
It seems like the moment she came out of the darkness and had an idea of the direction she wanted to go, doors started opening. So many of these "doors" were in perfect alignment with each other and the plan she had set in motion before her world caved in around her. She is open and receptive to being an active part of her own life again. It is as if she has had CPR for her soul. She was exactly where I wanted to be. Standing on the other side of the crevice which almost enveloped her. She isn't at the top of her mountain yet but she is standing victorious and taking in the view before she starts her upward climb again.
One of the most amazing coincidences is how her present list of goals correlates with some of my goals. One of the goals I abandoned five years ago was fulfilling my practicum in order to attain my fitness trainer certification. I was "that close" to completion. I never followed through. My friend is exactly where I was when I abandoned ship. She has been given an opportunity to follow through and complete this!
Someone planted the seed of opening up a Bed and Breakfast when she was in the mire of not knowing where she was going to wake up in the morning (not quite, she was just "in between homes and lives" at that point in time) and now that she is coming out the other side of all of these life changing transitions, she is realizing the possibility of owning a B & B is something she is keenly interested in. She mentioned the idea of a business partner ...
Wow! My youngest son is "this close" to becoming an independent entity from myself. I am quite possibly five years away from making life changing decisions about where I live and what I do. I just read about 50 to 60 year olds giving up their dreams and not setting long term goals. All of these factors seem to be lining up in a row and suddenly I see my "impossible dream" could become a possibility if I am not too fearful to make a move.
I know my life is in need of a shake-up. I don't foresee any personal tragedies unfolding which is going to necessitate a "fight or flight" response for me (this has always been my motivating factor in the past). Maybe, just maybe I can peek in some of these doors and see what lies beyond. Maybe it is time to make a "5 Year Plan". Maybe ...