Feeling Lazy

I am not getting the feeling of accomplishment that I have become rather addicted to. I'm sitting here spinning my wheels ...

I have never seen the numbers on the scale so high before. The activities (or lack of) of late have not been good for my waistline!

What's that all about?!? I started exercising when I weighed less! And now I weigh more? What incentive is that? Sheesh!

So, I decided to sleep in (in lieu of exercising) the past few mornings. I feel better when I bounce out of bed in the morning with a purpose and a plan.

My appetite went crazy after I started exercising. My brain was in overdrive and one of the mom's that I babysit for says you eat more when you are using your brain more (she's a student, so she should know, right?). I'm frustrated.

"The Secret" says to just place an order for your ideal weight as if you were looking in a catalogue. Sounds kind of hokey, but you know what? Tonight as I sat and focused on the number on the scale that I would like to return back to, I curbed my snacking. I focused on the numbers I want to see on the scale. And recognized that I really was full. I just wanted to eat out of habit, out of comfort ... 'filling the void' again.

I feel lazy in every capacity. Fat and lazy to boot.

I'm 'ordering' my ideal weight. I think I need to order some direction back into my days so that I can have that feeling of accomplishment at the end of the day. I think I'm addicted to that feeling.

Feeling lazy is fun for a little while, but I don't want to stay here!