Making Memories

It was a fantastic Easter weekend. A little bit of this, a little bit of that, a lot of fun, surrounded by family and a little time to absorb it all at the end.

It is our Easter tradition, to get together with my mom so that I can do her income tax. Sometimes she comes to me ... other times, I go to her. But Easter always comes in the spring and before April 30th. A combination that makes 'Easter' a time for Mom.

This year, her birthday conveniently landed on the same weekend. And luckily, I heard of a few family members who hadn't made Easter plans. So I took a chance and invited 'the family' for an Easter/Birthday gathering.

It felt right, from the moment the thought came to my mind.

I can't begin to count the number of times that I have had that instinctual thought, that I have talked myself out of doing. "I can't"... "I'm scared" ... "What if no one accepts?" ... "It's too much work" ... It's out of my comfort zone is what it all boiled down to.

The last few years have taught me one valuable lesson. "If you think it, then say it. And do it!" I have come up with a few wild ideas (wild to me, anyway) throughout these past years. I have followed up on so many of them, that I can't think of the ones that I have shied away from. I have absolutely no regrets.

This weekend was a perfect example of why you must follow through on those 'great ideas'. Sister #1 immediately responded "What a great idea! I'll ask my family" (and just over half of her family was able to attend). Sister #2 did not respond. She was afraid that her family would accept the invitation. And they did! I have earned the nick name "Crazy Lady" ... but if this was a crazy idea, I wish I had earned the title long ago. My Only Brother had already made other plans, but he knew that it would be a success. And it was.

Our family is a mixture of personalities. Everyone has something special and unique to add to the pot. You put all of that together on a sunny Saturday afternoon, and the result is ... perfection.

If I let the day 'blur' in my mind, what I hear, see and feel is 'happiness'. The kids played together, met some second cousins and made new friends. I don't recall any crying or fighting or discord of any sort. That could be because their parents kept a distant, but watchful eye over things and nothing ever got out of hand. But also, I think it's because they were just a bunch of kids having fun.

My sisters are an extension of my mind and appendages. I didn't even have to think a thought and it was done. Food came and went. The kitchen was under control at all times. Possibly it was because they took on more of the worrying than I did. I'm not sure what I was doing as all of this was happening, but the load was definitely shared by many.

My adult sons took on the role of co-hosts. I often worry about the men, when these gatherings take place at my house. I don't have much entertainment for the guys. For the most part, I have lived my life 'solo', so I don't have a live-in male co-conspirator at my side. But I forgot. Boys grow into men. And my sons stepped up to the plate with ease. My Youngest has a ways to go ... but I have no doubt, with his Older Brothers as role models, he will follow in their footsteps one day.

I had no idea what the weather would have in store for us, so I didn't set up the tables in advance (not knowing if supper would be an indoor meal or outside). But that wasn't a problem. The men set up and dismantled the tables and chairs and I didn't lift a finger.

It was a day where I didn't even have to think. It unfolded on its own (with a great deal of assistance by my family). I had a chance to talk to many. I relaxed. I enjoyed every moment.

But the best gift of all, is that perhaps my mom enjoyed it as well. She found a quieter, warmer spot in the house (the weather co-operated and we were able to spend the day outside) and had the opportunity to have a more up close and personal visit with her family. It was her birthday. She was the unknowing guest of honor. She was the reason that so many wanted to come. Noise and crowds have never been her cup of tea, but in the relative quietness of the kitchen, she was able to take in the part of these gatherings that she enjoys. One-on-one time with her kith and kin.

My own little family had the entirety of Friday, to entertain Mom. We had an 'unwritten' agenda that we had in the back of our minds. Once again, the day unfolded easily. We visited, we laughed and we dreamed. We spoke of the past but focused on the future. It was a day filled with humor and joy.

I had a quiet day to absorb the events of the weekend. It was a day where I reflected on the weekend-past and a few emails that I wanted to send. I didn't have any public declarations to make. I shared my words with a hand picked 'audience'. I let myself simply absorb and savor the memories.

I look at my family - my siblings and our 'extensions of ourselves' ... our children. I marvel at the connections that we have and that we are nurturing. Looking beyond my immediate family and getting to know my own aunts and uncles has helped me to appreciate every little memory that we are making along life's way. The small stuff is big. Belonging to a family that feels so connected is a gift. I marvel at my parents for their role in guiding us into the people we became.

Then I wonder. Am I giving that same gift to my own children? I hope so ...