Relief

The weight of the world on my shoulders is starting to lessen. One part of the equation is one third of my three committed weekends is behind me - the most challenging weekend (hosting guests feels hard) is checked off the list. The other part of this equation is I have allowed myself the luxury of taking Ibuprofen to provide a little physical relief.

My neck has been a thorn in my side (literally a pain-in-the-neck) for the better part of the time since I moved to my new home. I blame my couch.

A comfy couch and comfortable kitchen chairs were at the top of my wish list when I made this move. There is a small little nook for the couch and only a select few models would fit in the space. I felt like I'd won the lottery when I found a couch that checked all the boxes. It not only fit into the space, it turns into a bed and it has the chaise lounge feature which has storage to hold the bedding. Perfect!

I couldn't wait to settle in, make a cozy little spot to support my neck/head and have a Netflix weekend marathon.

Exhaustion washed over me and falling asleep in front of the TV became my new norm. I cannot actually even recall the first few months of living here. Other than I worked, ate supper and went to bed. I must have actually sat on the couch. Yes, I now remember. I did sit on it to discover it was hard and uncomfortable. I then sat on each cushion, bounced myself up and down and worked my way down the couch. No better. Next I literally stood and jumped on the couch. Slight (very) improvement.

My next vivid memory is nestling in to watch TV and the moment my body started to relax, shooting pains emanated from my neck straight into my skull. I adjusted, readjusted, added pillows, more pillows, different pillows and nothing worked except for lying on my side with a brand new, plump down filled bed pillow which held my head and shoulders at exactly the right angle so I could watch TV. Of course the moment I was lying down, comfortable and watching TV, I fell asleep.

I have gone through all the pain killers I had in the house - all of which are well over seven years old. I know this, because I had some of Mom's Tylenol and she died seven years ago. All of my own pain relief pills were older than that. At this point, I knew I had to seek other alternatives.

I have been to a doctor and prescribed some muscle relaxants. No noticeable relief. 

I went to a Physical Therapist and came home with a stretching regimen. I was determined to do my part so I started the twice-a-day routine that night. I injured my neck even more, in the process. I quit immediately but restarted very, very carefully after my neck felt as bad as it did before I began. My neck felt worse than ever. So I quit again.

I went to a massage therapist. I was relieved of the neck pain during the night, only to have it replaced with a constant nagging discomfort all day instead. I told this to her and the next time she made some adjustments that brought back the night discomfort with a side order of day discomfort. Third time back, I told her this and she readjusted things so I was only slightly better than I was before I began.

I bought a special Ecoden pillow which was advertised to be EXACTLY what I needed. I tried it the first night and the stabbing pains I feel when I relax on my couch was my neck's immediate reaction. I tossed it onto the floor but tried again. Once again, this pillow felt as hard as my comfy-looking couch so I tossed it onto the floor and jumped on it to try to break it in. 

The new pillow was introduced during the course of my massage treatments. The other side effect of my massage therapy was the down bed pillow that used to work so I could watch TV on the couch stopped working. I was trying everything, so I tried the Ecoden pillow to watch TV. I seemed to need the cardboard-like support, while lying down on the couch to support my increasingly heavy head. For the moment, this provides me enough comfort to fall asleep while watching TV.

My x-ray results say "mild multilevel disc space narrowing with marginal osteophytes are seen throughout the cervical spine, compatible with degenerative changes".

All I can say is, if this is aging, I'm done with it. 

I call what I have a "low grade discomfort". I know I'm fortunate. So many others have mid to high grade pain all or most of the time, with relief that most likely feels like low grade discomfort at best. My discomfort is focused on one small area of my entire body. It could be so much worse.

My diagnosis is - I have TV neck. Kind of like tennis elbow - TV neck is a repetitive injury caused by overuse of the same joint over an extended period of time.

For the short term, I'm going to fall back on pain killers to give my poor old neck a break. For the longer term, I will try to cut back on the TV watching and combine that with some light stretches.

The end.

P.S. My friend, who spent enough time here to actually sit back and relax on my comfy-looking-couch is about my height, and she found exactly the same "pull" I described when she sat back on the couch. See?? It IS the couch's fault!! 

Hidden Blessings

Life threw us a few curve balls this past week ...

Our Senior Cat in Residence took a sharp turn for the worse one day. The vet cured his sneezing and excessive mucous condition, but almost immediately after he completed his dose of antibiotics things started to change.

I thought it was an side effect of the medication. I assumed once the antibiotics were out of his system he would be back to his regular self. I was wrong.

Litter conditions changed, there was another somewhat steep decline in food consumption. In the past, when one cat lost some weight, the second cat gained it. Total cat weight stayed the same. Food consumption remained static. This was not the case.

When the cat food started to last much longer than usual several months ago, my thoughts immediately went to the cost savings. Instead of going through one bag every four weeks, it was lasting five weeks. When my daughter commented on the recent decline in cat food consumed, along with our Senior Cat losing more weight, it raised alarm bells.

Then one day (it seemed suddenly, but in actuality it had been happening gradually for quite some time), Senior was laying down in odd spots throughout the day. The bathroom tiled floor, the bathtub and en route to wherever he was going. By nightfall, I noticed his walking was severely compromised. He was wobbling and could barely stand, let alone walk. My daughter had observed the same and we convened in the hallway where he stalled. 

This was serious. It felt like it happened overnight (it didn't). I honestly wondered if he would make it through the night. My daughter slept with one eye and two ears open all night (she didn't sleep). He made it.

In unrelated events (but I promise to tie the two subjects together) ...

The next morning, our internet went out. Just as I was thinking how fortunate we were that the city was grading our back alley, POOF! Our services were cut (literally - the grader dug up our internet cable which had not been buried). After a phone call to our service provider and some troubleshooting, we were put on a two day wait list for a service call.

The perfect storm ended up being a blessing in disguise.

No internet = more family time + a sick cat = lots of desire to talk it through.

Long story short, we took our cat to the vet and her suspicion is our cat's kidneys aren't functioning properly. Blood tests will confirm or deny, but the cure's starting cost is medication at the cost of approximately $130 per month PLUS a new diet of special renal cat food. She did give our cat one pill which stimulated his appetite and the increase of nutrients definitely smoothed things out the past few days. But it isn't a cure. We firmly believe our cat is in his end days.

Our missing internet connection provided the best conditions we could wish for, as my ability to work was hampered and my daughter's desire to be on the computer was thwarted.

We talked, we reminisced, we simply sat with each other's company while enjoying moments with our ailing kitty.

It was the worst of times, but we managed to turn them into the best moments one could hope for under the circumstances. There can be small blessings buried deeply within some of the hardest of times. 

Ray's favorite resting spot has been on the register of the bathroom for quite a spell now.
I added the comfort of the softest hand towel we have and he seems to appreciate my effort.

**Update - a recent check-in brought encouraging news. Ray seems to be doing well and appears to be walking normally. His blood tests are still pending. My hope is perhaps a change of "gold-nugget" cat food (Ray has been on an expensive special gastro-intestinal diet since shortly after we adopted him) may ease us through this next phase. Who knows? We can hope for the best...**

Life Hurts

When our bodies heal as they usually do and life resumes in an orderly fashion after being inconvenienced with aches and ailments that go away as they have done in the past, we are fortunate.

I have a recurring irritation that tends to heal itself but in the middle of the process I have started to wonder, "What if this is the time it doesn't go away?" It seems to be stress related and when my stressors subside so does my discomfort. What if those very stressors continued to stay on high alert?

In a valiant effort to save time, I was so very excited to book my flu shot and the latest COVID vaccination on the same day. The time it steals from my day is the biggest inconvenience but pretty painless all in all. Except when the day settles down and I stop moving my arms. Oooo. That hurt. I stretched and moved my arms until I went to bed and then I slept with a heated wheat bag which soothed me and my arm and served as a positive diversion from my attention to the pain which had found me. 

My hip started to ache at the tail end of a rather lengthy hike. That one kept me up at night. I stretched. I moved. I stretched some more. The next day it was not back to normal. I kept moving and carried on with my day. In the midst of this longer-than-usual discomfort, I wondered "Is this what starts to happen when one needs joints replaced?" I can't even remember if it lingered a little longer or not. Whether it lasted one day or two is not the point. The point is it fixed itself. I just kept moving and whatever may have been inflamed settled down on its own.

As I thought of recent minor ailments that have come and gone, this post was writing itself in my mind. Then it happened again. Out of the blue, after a completely normal day, at the day's end  my knee started to feel a little sharp pang (more like a ping) when I walked on it. I was careful not to irritate it but soon enough I was resting and soon asleep. End of story. Nope. I woke up this morning and the little pangs continued. Heat? No, my knee simply felt like it wanted a little support. I wrapped a tension bandage around my knee and if felt like a nice little hug. As I walked around and tended to my morning to-do-list, soon enough my knee was back to normal.

Sometimes I need to remove restrictions to avoid irritation. Other times I need a little constriction to feel a little extra support. Sometimes I can stretch it out. Other times a little extra heat does the trick.

I wonder if my minor maladies mirror what is going on with my mental state of being. Sometimes I feel too constricted. Other times I need bit of support. Sometimes I can keep moving and stretching my mind and my coping mechanisms. Other times I just need to cozy up and sleep it off.

In the middle of these discomforts I tend to forget they are temporary. My head knows this to be true but my inner child feels a little whiny and just wants to feel back to normal. Now.

Listening to our body. Listening to our thoughts. Listen. Try to feel what your body, mind and soul are telling you. This isn't a cure all but it is free of charge, no medicinal ingredients required and just another instance of sometimes having what you need is closer than you know.

I'm not a doctor. This is not professional advise. It is simply things that work for me when the chips are down. I think my body is doing just fine but my state of mind? It needs a little TLC from time to time.

Please take good care of yourself and let your body tell you what it needs. Call for medical advise when your body is screaming "Help!" but while waiting for relief see if your instincts are telling you how to manage things until medical aid is received.