As I have been busy documenting my life there seems to be an ongoing storyboard taking place in my mind. When I sit down at the end of the day or week with my pictures and video footage, I have an idea of the 'story' I want to tell by slicing and dicing the clips and rearranging them in a sequence that makes a point and hopefully entertains at the same time (I'm entertaining myself anyway...).
My video footage is all pretty tame stuff. Not the dramas that the media deals with as they make the headlines that sell our papers and grab the viewing audience. But what I have seen from my own experience is how you can put a slant on a story by highlighting one thing, while omitting another.
I am thinking of my daycare videos as I write this ... it wouldn't be too entertaining to watch the mundaneness of our days. Or the chaos (although I would love to insert a soundbite into the blog to portray the soundtrack of my days here). But as I think of my 'audience' I have to be aware of how they will interpret what they are seeing and hearing.
What is more important to me is the perception I get from rewinding the days and reliving them every evening. If I was to focus on the bickering, the crying, the chaos ... it would only serve to bring me down. My goal with my daycare blog is to focus on the positive, the innocense and the humor that I can find in the day.
Am I lying by portraying what I want to portray? Am I really no different than the reporter that only tells one side of the story? Or presents the information with a bias that sways what the reader or viewer is interpreting?
Life is all about perception. The same thing can happen to 10 different people and they could internalize and interpret it 1o different ways (or more). Those 10 people could read the same newspaper article and find 10 ways to understand it.
We choose how to react to life. We choose what to focus on. If you look for the negative in every situation, that is exactly what you'll find. If you look for the positive, you will find that as well.
Whether a person is the one doing the reporting or the one doing the interpreting, there is always room for debate as to the point that is being made. It is like looking at a painting and seeing something different than anyone else. Is life an art form?
And is this the point I actually set out to make when I started this entry????
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
I Spoke Too Soon
--Our poor, poor kitty ended up with an abscess that had to be dealt with today. In the 8 years that we have had him, he has had that untamed wanderlust. Yet, he always comes home fully intact and without any sign of confrontations. He used to proudly come home with birds that he had caught ... but never with any sign that he went out looking for a fight.
--After his muskrat encounter a while ago, he slipped out one more time. This time he didn't come back for over 8 hours. I was just giving up on him and thought I'd have to go to bed and hope he was there in the morning. I called for him one last time. He came home meowing me a story like you wouldn't believe. He was definitely trying to tell me what he had been up to. But since the cat translator that they have invented only works in Japanese so far, I had to just nod and smile. I touched him and he had that 'mauled' feel to him. Kind of like a dog had slobbered all over him. But there were no bumps, lumps or injuries and I thought nothing more about it. That was a week ago, last Sunday.
--This Sunday, when we returned from the wedding, he didn't come running out to greet us as he usually does. I called for him and he appeared but he had a few meows "with attitude" (I thought he was mad at us for leaving him again) and he disappeared. I was busy unpacking and tending to all the things I thought I had to do that night ... and I didn't see him again until I was headed for bed.
--He was very lethargic and sort of looked like he was favoring an ear (his ear was slightly cocked). There seemed to be a little lump but I thought it would heal itself and didn't think too much about it.
--Monday night, he was really looking rough. Before the night was through, this lump started to ooze a bit and it looked like it must have been infected. The next morning, he scratched it and most of the lump burst. Again, I hoped he may be able to tend to himself ... but being a cat ... he scratched it until it was a terrible mess. I called the vet and they could squeeze him in this morning. Thank goodness Dale is willing and able to help me out on these little emergencies - this is the second time he ran Andre to the vet during the day (their evening and weekend appointments are really booked up quite far in advance).
--Dale picked Andre up for his appointment. I expected Andre to come home with a cone to keep him from scratching and antibiotics ... but Dale returned catless. My heart skipped a beat when Dale told me they had to keep him - they had to put him under anesthetic to deal with the abscess and we could pick him up later.
--6 hours and $307 later, our poor sad kitty is back home. He is so annoyed with that cone that I don't think he is appreciating the fact that we are trying to make him feel better.
--A person spends money on their pets without blinking an eye. There is no way that I could have not doctored him through this episode. Without question, he needed medical attention. I've always managed to juggle the books to compensate for whatever financial crisis's come up. Somehow, things have a way of working out.
--'Family first' ... and our cat is a cherished member of our family. I'll juggle the books and make this affordable. I just want my cat healed and happy again. I just hope he's laying there ''thinking about what he has done", to get into this predicament. He's not a thinker. He spent a night in jail (the pound) when they caught him wandering at large ... and he didn't learn his lesson then either. Here's to hoping this time is the charm .........
Monday, June 23, 2008
The Excitement Level is High!!
I am so busy 'living my life' and making memories that I am having a tough time finding the opportunity to sit down and write about it.
I have so many words in me tonight that I thought this would be a good time to unload them somewhere!
The weekend. FANtastic in every way ...
2 luxurious days off! It was perfect. I had some time to myself Saturday morning before we headed off to the wedding. I need that solitude. It recharges and sustains me. And ... I enjoy my own company. Wow.
Then, once we were on the road headed to our wedding destination I felt like a kid at Christmas. I simply couldn't wait to be there. In among my family. Savoring every moment. Making memories. The trip seemed endless as I anticipated the day ahead.
And it exceeded my expectations. I had it set in my mind that I was going to participate in the day. And I did. When I got too quiet, I'd wander around with my camera/video recorder and the next thing I knew I was involved in the day and not just watching it.
The wedding was wonderful. My niece (that got married) glows on a bad day so you can just imagine how such a beautiful, vibrant and enthusiastic personality would look on her wedding day. As she said when she started her thank you speech "I've waited almost 40 years for this day ..... " and it looks as though it was worth the wait. I really don't know her husband at all, but as I overheard him say, "I couldn't have found a nicer girl" so sincerely to someone in my vicinity, he won me over in that moment.
The weather was perfect (it was an outdoor wedding in a campground) ... the atmosphere was happy, supportive and loving ... they were surrounded by close family and friends ... and it just all felt so right.
I came home and raced through the 'reality' of my house/responsibilities/unpacking and I couldn't wait to sit down and start working with my video footage and pictures. I was pretty overwhelmed last night but I woke up this morning with ideas of how to mix all the material I have together in themes and 'tell a story'. It's starting ....
Then I had a group of families I used to babysit for, come over for a BBQ tonight. It turned out that there were 3 moms, a grandma and a step dad for adults and 5 kids (they all became good friends while they stayed here). The conversation between the adults was amazing. Everyone was involved, interested and the words just flew. One family actually stood up to leave, but they were so interested in the conversation, that they sat right down again (and stayed at least another half hour). Oh - and the kids appeared to enjoy themselves as well.
"Heroes among us" would describe the way I feel about the grandma that was here. She has a story. Very interesting, rather sad and tragic in places ... but she has come through the other side of a very hard situation with a positive attitude and a fighting spirit. I could sit and listen to her for hours ....
And the best part of all were the parting words "We'll have to get together again ... you do make good coffee!" (long story about how my mom thought she was subtly telling me I made bad coffee, so she gave me tips on how to improve it ... and it must have worked).
Inviting people in to my life. Making memories. Living my life. Omigosh. I'm so happy I could burst.
I have so many words in me tonight that I thought this would be a good time to unload them somewhere!
The weekend. FANtastic in every way ...
2 luxurious days off! It was perfect. I had some time to myself Saturday morning before we headed off to the wedding. I need that solitude. It recharges and sustains me. And ... I enjoy my own company. Wow.
Then, once we were on the road headed to our wedding destination I felt like a kid at Christmas. I simply couldn't wait to be there. In among my family. Savoring every moment. Making memories. The trip seemed endless as I anticipated the day ahead.
And it exceeded my expectations. I had it set in my mind that I was going to participate in the day. And I did. When I got too quiet, I'd wander around with my camera/video recorder and the next thing I knew I was involved in the day and not just watching it.
The wedding was wonderful. My niece (that got married) glows on a bad day so you can just imagine how such a beautiful, vibrant and enthusiastic personality would look on her wedding day. As she said when she started her thank you speech "I've waited almost 40 years for this day ..... " and it looks as though it was worth the wait. I really don't know her husband at all, but as I overheard him say, "I couldn't have found a nicer girl" so sincerely to someone in my vicinity, he won me over in that moment.
The weather was perfect (it was an outdoor wedding in a campground) ... the atmosphere was happy, supportive and loving ... they were surrounded by close family and friends ... and it just all felt so right.
I came home and raced through the 'reality' of my house/responsibilities/unpacking and I couldn't wait to sit down and start working with my video footage and pictures. I was pretty overwhelmed last night but I woke up this morning with ideas of how to mix all the material I have together in themes and 'tell a story'. It's starting ....
Then I had a group of families I used to babysit for, come over for a BBQ tonight. It turned out that there were 3 moms, a grandma and a step dad for adults and 5 kids (they all became good friends while they stayed here). The conversation between the adults was amazing. Everyone was involved, interested and the words just flew. One family actually stood up to leave, but they were so interested in the conversation, that they sat right down again (and stayed at least another half hour). Oh - and the kids appeared to enjoy themselves as well.
"Heroes among us" would describe the way I feel about the grandma that was here. She has a story. Very interesting, rather sad and tragic in places ... but she has come through the other side of a very hard situation with a positive attitude and a fighting spirit. I could sit and listen to her for hours ....
And the best part of all were the parting words "We'll have to get together again ... you do make good coffee!" (long story about how my mom thought she was subtly telling me I made bad coffee, so she gave me tips on how to improve it ... and it must have worked).
Inviting people in to my life. Making memories. Living my life. Omigosh. I'm so happy I could burst.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
The Past
I guess a person really knows they have moved on, when a person from their past phones and initiates a conversation that has the potential to relive and stir up the emotions of a time gone by. Then as soon as the phone is hung up, "life goes on." No residual feelings. No replaying the conversation to look for hidden meanings. No anger or sadness. Nothing.
When I think about the 'forever relationships' gone wrong and the reappearance of these people in my life that has nothing to do with our children, I think about the home that I found for our dog. And how thrilled that I am that he has found the loving and appreciative family that he so deserved. This is truly all I wish for the ''exes'' in my life. I would love to hear that they have found a loving and appreciative person in their life. But I don't think it is my job to find it for them (I didn't sign onto that, like I did when I adopted our dog from the SPCA). If we can hold a friendly conversation that is not tied to our past, that would be good (but not essential).
It isn't easy picking up the pieces. But it is necessary. I feel that a person must acknowledge that it takes 2 people to make a relationship work ... it takes 2 to argue ... one person is never entirely to blame ... try to learn from the experience ... grieve it ... let the anger come ... and go ... honor the good parts (but don't romanticize them) ... rebuild yourself from the inside ... and look towards the future.
Life has gone on for me. As it should for every person in a relationship that hasn't withstood the tests of time.
I honor the past .... but I am letting it go.
When I think about the 'forever relationships' gone wrong and the reappearance of these people in my life that has nothing to do with our children, I think about the home that I found for our dog. And how thrilled that I am that he has found the loving and appreciative family that he so deserved. This is truly all I wish for the ''exes'' in my life. I would love to hear that they have found a loving and appreciative person in their life. But I don't think it is my job to find it for them (I didn't sign onto that, like I did when I adopted our dog from the SPCA). If we can hold a friendly conversation that is not tied to our past, that would be good (but not essential).
It isn't easy picking up the pieces. But it is necessary. I feel that a person must acknowledge that it takes 2 people to make a relationship work ... it takes 2 to argue ... one person is never entirely to blame ... try to learn from the experience ... grieve it ... let the anger come ... and go ... honor the good parts (but don't romanticize them) ... rebuild yourself from the inside ... and look towards the future.
Life has gone on for me. As it should for every person in a relationship that hasn't withstood the tests of time.
I honor the past .... but I am letting it go.
Friday, June 20, 2008
2 Days Off, A Wedding and Family
That sums up the excitement I have in store this weekend.
As usual, 2 days off thrill me. I love 2 day weekends! I felt the calmness seep into my being as this morning unfolded as I let the reality of a 2 day weekend sink in. Ahhhhh!!
And a wedding. My niece is getting married tomorrow. I'm not much of a social butterfly and I usually quietly sit back and observe the day more than participate in it.
This wedding is being held in a campground. Very fun and informal sounding. And ... I have my camera and Flip Video as my arsenol. I hope to wander around and catch moments on film. Already I am visualizing the day and what I can do with the pictures and footage I capture.
Filming these special moments has completely transformed me. I don't know if I have become entirely annoying to be around, with my video camera in tow? Hopefully not, because I am simply having too much fun!
And family!! My entire family will be there (sisters, brother and Mom). We will be a small minority in the wedding crowd ... but we will all be there. This excites me!!
Yesterday the shipment of "The Book" arrived. So I will be able to deliver these books in person to all of my immediate family. I mailed off all the rest last night. "The book is in the mail!!" The process has felt complete to me, for a long time. Now that the family will have it in their hands, it will complete the process to them. I'm ready to start all over again!!
I've been puttering away at the things I must do to be prepared for the wedding and also a BBQ I'm having on Monday. As soon as that is done, I'll be buying baseboards and painting them for the bedroom that is being renovated. Then there will be all the shuffling around of things to take best advantage of our new space (it will be complete very soon!!).
One day, I would like to sit in the back yard and read a book. And reflect. Man, I have a great life. I am so very, very blessed ....
As usual, 2 days off thrill me. I love 2 day weekends! I felt the calmness seep into my being as this morning unfolded as I let the reality of a 2 day weekend sink in. Ahhhhh!!
And a wedding. My niece is getting married tomorrow. I'm not much of a social butterfly and I usually quietly sit back and observe the day more than participate in it.
This wedding is being held in a campground. Very fun and informal sounding. And ... I have my camera and Flip Video as my arsenol. I hope to wander around and catch moments on film. Already I am visualizing the day and what I can do with the pictures and footage I capture.
Filming these special moments has completely transformed me. I don't know if I have become entirely annoying to be around, with my video camera in tow? Hopefully not, because I am simply having too much fun!
And family!! My entire family will be there (sisters, brother and Mom). We will be a small minority in the wedding crowd ... but we will all be there. This excites me!!
Yesterday the shipment of "The Book" arrived. So I will be able to deliver these books in person to all of my immediate family. I mailed off all the rest last night. "The book is in the mail!!" The process has felt complete to me, for a long time. Now that the family will have it in their hands, it will complete the process to them. I'm ready to start all over again!!
I've been puttering away at the things I must do to be prepared for the wedding and also a BBQ I'm having on Monday. As soon as that is done, I'll be buying baseboards and painting them for the bedroom that is being renovated. Then there will be all the shuffling around of things to take best advantage of our new space (it will be complete very soon!!).
One day, I would like to sit in the back yard and read a book. And reflect. Man, I have a great life. I am so very, very blessed ....
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Pumped and Ready For Action!
My heart is beating with excitement this morning. Is it the caffeine that I have added back into my diet or is it the anticipation I have about my world? The caffeine is enjoyable but I think it is more than that.
I have a list of must-do items swirling around in my head. Things in preparation of going to a wedding this weekend ... preparation for the barbeque invitation I've extended (the day after we return from the wedding) ... a note that I want to write to my niece (soon-to-be-bride) ... the ideas I have swimming in my head for some new 'movie projects' of the events of the upcoming days ...
The creative side of my brain has taken over and there seems to be no harnessing it. And I'm running with it!
I have a list of must-do items swirling around in my head. Things in preparation of going to a wedding this weekend ... preparation for the barbeque invitation I've extended (the day after we return from the wedding) ... a note that I want to write to my niece (soon-to-be-bride) ... the ideas I have swimming in my head for some new 'movie projects' of the events of the upcoming days ...
The creative side of my brain has taken over and there seems to be no harnessing it. And I'm running with it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)