Is My Old Life Back Yet??

Yet one more untypical day for me. We got through it unscathed. I just hope 'normal' resumes soon ...

My 'first-appointment-of-the-day' at the doctors ended up with more blood work; one more perscription; and one more ultrasound. I really don't have time for this ... can I table my health until my holidays I wonder??

I called the families I babysit, to let them know I was home, as soon as I returned from my appointment. In between the time I called and the kids were dropped off, I ended up getting squeezed into an ultrasound appointment this morning. The only catch ... I had to take 2 kids with me.

Kids are capable of living up to our expectations. I can't begin to say how many times I've heard parents talk about their kids, right in front of their kids. And the parents are almost 'telling' their kids to do the wrong things.

I heard a speaker once say to tell your kids what you want them to do. Don't tell them what you don't want them to do, because all they really hear is what you have told them. For example, if you say, "Don't fight" the child hones in on and hears "fight" (very simplified example). Another thing I've noticed is all the attention that kids for being 'bad'. The bad behaviour gets talked about all of the time and that is what is getting attention. I do my best to only say positive things (or nothing at all) about the kids when they are within earshot, and if we are battling behaviour problems I feel that is better between myself and the parent (without the child listening in).

When I told one of my mom's that I was planning on taking her son and one of the other kids with me to this appointment, she looked at me like she thought I was crazy. I just told her that he would be good. There simply wasn't an option.

And he was fine. I'm sure he would have sat perfectly still, had he not had anyone else with him. But there were 2 of them, so they got a tiny bit chatty (but still good). I took along a few 'quiet toys' that they rarely see, for the time they had to spend in the office with me. That held their attention for possibly 4 or 5 minutes out of the 15 minutes we were there. But it was a distraction anyway.

When the mom picked up her child tonight, she 'told' me how he would have acted if she took him. "He would have touched everything in sight, because he had never seen anything like it before." Sure he'd touch it ... because she 'tells' him to ... and she expects him to.

I know parenting someone else's child is 100% easier than parenting your own. I know I make my mistakes and I can't see what I'm doing 'from the outside, looking in'. But I remember what Mom told me about when she took us anywhere, as kids. "It was expected" (that we would behave). This thinking seems to be the same as what I hear from varied sources. Even "The Secret" focuses on thinking/feeling/seeing the results you want and the 'reality' will follow.

I do focus on telling the kids what I do want (most of the time, anyway). I've got so many rules and stipulations and expectations that I sometimes remind myself of a drill sargeant. Yet, when everyone follows 'the rules', no one is being hurt/toys aren't being broken/no one is choking (I'm really strict at the kitchen table, because one of my main rules is "Choking is not allowed" and horseplay at the table seems to me, like it could lead to choking) etc etc.

Yes, I know I need to lighten up a notch as well. I wish I had a clone ... 'one' of me to tend to the work that needs to be done to keep things running smoothly around here ... and a 'second me' that did nothing but focus on the kids. That isn't reality though ... 'life at daycare' is a stepping stone towards 'life at school'. And I just hope that 'this' life prepares them for what is coming up next for them?

I must be back to my 'regular old life', if my focus is back on my kids and my days. I enjoy ruts. I'm ready to hop back into a nice and comfortable one!! Welcome back to my 'old life'....