I have quickly grown accustomed to feeling happy. Waking up and loving your life is a most wonderful habit to be in. I hadn't been feeling so elated with my life the last little while and I mourned the loss of that bounce in my step.
The past few days have turned things around for me once again. I know a person can't always be feeling on top of their world. The low spots, the struggles, the challenges and stress and even the tedium of the same old, same old are just a part of life. The secret is not to lose yourself in those down turns.
I have been falling prey to letting myself dwell on the negativity. I looked at the days and I didn't feel in control. For me, that is key. In a situation where you feel like you have no control, there is still some small portion that you can do something about. How you react to it.
It was the overwhelmed feeling that I had in my daycare world that was bringing me down the most. When I actually sat down, wrote what I was feeling and saw it looking back at me, I realized that what was bothering me specifically wasn't the entirety of the situation. But a few small pieces. And when I dissected those 'pieces' more carefully, I saw that I wasn't fighting a losing battle - I was already ahead of the game because my parents were communicating with me. It's just that I have so many of them, that I was feeling that my days were spinning out of control. And they are not.
I did what I always do when I feel my daycare situation is running amok. I wrote a newsletter. Putting words to paper and sharing them requires me to take a positive spin ... I still voiced my frustrations in a way to make my point but not have anyone take offense. That step alone, forces me to focus on what is positive in a negative situation. So I am already half way there when I find the right words.
Nothing has changed. Our day is still changing like the wind, a parent didn't pack spare clothes for their 2 yr old ... my 3 yr old in training had yet another accident, my 4 yr old with 'attitude' was sharing that again this morning, a mom with a day off on Monday is probably bringing her 2 yr old anyway - just because she can. This is my life.
My parents know how I feel and I am counting down the months to many of these upcoming maternity leaves (these families are my worst offenders) and I am grateful that nature has provided me a way out of some of this!
Not so long ago, I panicked when I realized all of these maternity leaves would upend my budget again. Last week, I realized I may be able to replace that lost income with a non-kid option. Today, I am grateful that some of these endless problems have an end in sight.
God never closes a door, without opening a window. Happiness may not be a daily occurence, but while you are waiting ... go find a new window to look through.
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