A Blessed Mother's Day

I've been voicing my annoyance at this holiday this year. The commercialism involved in so many holidays brings out that side of me that becomes angry at these Hallmark Holidays that magnify whatever is going on in one's life.

These holiday celebrations are all good and fine when life is good. Or simply okay. But when a person has suffered an involuntary change in the status of their life-as-they-know it, these holidays magnify the loss of a life that they once had.

I called my mom on Saturday because I wanted to talk to her. I was annoyed at myself when I thought 'I should wait until tomorrow and call her on Mother's Day instead'. So I picked up the phone and the first thing I did was tell her I didn't want any Hallmark holiday telling me what day to call her.

I had mailed a Mother's Day card to her on Tuesday ... but she didn't receive that last week. Our family pitched in together and purchased a gift for her which was due to arrive late April, but we found out last week that it was scheduled to arrive the Friday preceding Mother's Day. And she didn't receive that parcel in time either.

We adhered to the 'rules' of the day and life had other plans. Pretty minor in the scheme of things.

I couldn't help but think of My Friend, whose eyes welled up for a moment when she told me that she was going to call her aunt on Sunday and wish her a Happy Aunt's Day (since she couldn't call her own mom). She planned to take a quiet Sunday drive and visit the graves of her parents.

I wanted to lend her my mom. I was grateful for our family's connection ... where My Friend did have an opportunity to be surrounded by my mom and aunt (who were good friends of My Friend's Mom) and enveloped in a 'sense of family' at a gathering several months ago.

That moment ... the blink of that eye that contained an unshed tear ... made me sad.

In reality, I am also grateful for that day that acknowledges the Mom's of the World. Mom has told me that Mother's Day is one holiday that she does appreciate and enjoy. It is right and fitting to have a day that honors the selflessness of the Mom's everywhere.

I am beyond grateful that I have my mom to honor on this day. To be able to talk to her, write her, send her a card and know that she hears, reads and is able to accept these small tokens is a gift. A gift which I do not take lightly.

To those who have lost their moms ... to those whose family relationships do not fit within the norm of what we assume is 'happy' ... to those moms who have lost a child ... it is just another day. Another day that has the power to accentuate that, which you don't have.

It is my hope that those who fall in between the cracks of this Hallmark Holiday found their way through. May this day be one of silent tribute to a loved one ... a day to reflect on happier times ... a day to celebrate that you were the best mom, daughter or son that you knew how to be.

Sometimes all the love in the world doesn't make our life what we hoped it would be. Sometimes a little love goes a very long way.

I know that I am blessed beyond words. I have my mom. My adult children (as well as my soon-to-be-teenage son) are at a point in their lives where they openly show their gratitude for what I have tried to 'be' as a parent.

The thing that makes me blessed ... is that we don't need a holiday to tell us to do and say the deeds and words that portray our gratitude. We 'live' Mother's Day ... every day of the year. And for that, I am beyond grateful.