Monday feels like an assault to my senses after a most wonderful, leisurely two day weekend.
Yes, two days off to do with as I pleased. I wish housecleaning pleased me more than it does but it is becoming very apparent to me that I was not put on this earth to clean. So if not cleaning, what is my purpose here?
It was a gift to wake up to a day off that no one else in the world knew about. I didn't want to fill my bonus day off with commitments. I just wanted it to gently unfold so I could savor each moment as it arrived without expectation. That is exactly what happened.
It was a day filled with small moments. I felt like I was exactly where I was meant to be and I liked the person I was as I walked through the day.
That bonus day gave me the desire to put myself out into the world of family and friends. While I have been hoarding my time to try and conserve my energy, I have deprived myself of the gift of friendship.
I was the person I most wanted and needed to be. I felt a glimmer of the person I used to be when I felt excited about the life I have created within my little world.
I want to feel this way more often. I am not certain what the secret to this is, but I have a feeling it comes to saying "Yes" a little more often than I have been.
It's hard to step out of the safe little cocoon that has been embracing me and keeping me content. I'm stretching my wings a little bit. I'll fly again.
Monday, March 7, 2016
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