Momentum

I have to change a light bulb today. And while I am at it, I thought I'd sew a button onto my coat. Maybe if I get on a roll, I'll vacuum the accumulation of dust on the ceiling fan that my Youngest Son noticed a few weeks ago ...

What is happening to me? Where has my get-up-and-go gone??

I look at my week days and I feel the demands of my daycare family of one and two-year-olds are taking their toll, as the days of the week progress. How do I turn those demands around in a way that energize rather than deplete me?

I look at my weekends and I am torn by the demands that I am finding there. I have a few weekend obligations that are not hard to do. Once I am there. In fact, I feel energized because I have accomplished something, after-the-fact. If only I could place that energy within our home.

I have two days worth of flyers to deliver before I hang up my paper-carrier bag. Letting that responsibility go allows me to say that I have (almost) every week-day evening free. Free to do as I please.

What will I do with all of that free time? Maybe I should formulate a plan here and now so that it becomes as real to me as changing that light bulb and sewing on that button today.

I will:

• Read. I need input. Light and fluffy at first. Something deeper later. I simply need to reinstate the habit of reading into my life.
• Walk. I need sunlight and wide open spaces. I need to let my thoughts flow through me and I need to let them rise up into the heavens above. I need to let some things go.
• Invite people in. I have started to feel very greedy with my time once again. I know this is a warning sign. It means that I don't have enough of me left over in a day. I need to find the energy to expend because it always brings so much more back to me when I am in a state of giving.
• Work. Little things. Inside and outside of my home. I need to bring back a sense of pride of ownership with what I already have. It costs nothing to clean and cull through the excess. Physically cleaning out a closet (or drawer or room) makes room for new ideas and thought processes.
• Write. I need to let go of the idea that I can only write in the morning. I am blocking my own creativity when I put imaginary, self-imposed limitations on what I can do and when I can do it. It is time to break down those boundaries and leap over them.

I will start by changing a light bulb. Who knows where the momentum of this day will take me ...