I knew it. I just knew that there was some magical, unknown force holding our family and our home together. Why am I not surprised to find out that perhaps the magic pixie dust that is working so well is ... dust.
A day of housecleaning unveiled this fact. The plaster that came off a wall when I took down a tension rod. The toilet seat that broke when I put the rod (ever so carefully aligning the paint and plaster back to its original spot). The blind slats that broke when I scrubbed off the grease. Then ... the computer that died after it was vacuumed when My Son replaced the power supply yesterday (which I didn't think was a very good idea at the time).
Then came the little things. I was just a little bit grumpier than usual when all of my freshly scrubbed surfaces became dirty so soon after I had cleaned them. Suddenly I was thinking of things as 'my kitchen' and 'my house'. When it is clean ... it is mine. When it is lived in and swiped-down-as-we-go it is ours.
I don't like it when I hear married people talk of joint property with the word 'my' as the possessive pronoun. I cringe when I hear this. If this is the word that spills off a person's tongue, I can only imagine the 'possessive' self-talk that is ongoing in their mind.
Personally? I do believe I will try to hold onto a little bit of this perspective as I deal with the ongoing issue of dust and dirt. It is our dirt. And I will treat it accordingly.
If obsessiveness overtakes my cleaning and turns 'ours' into 'mine', I will know that I have gone a little too far.
Everything in moderation, you see. Even housecleaning!
Monday, May 13, 2013
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Housecleaning 101 - The Job That Never Goes Away
Despite the many hours of cleaning that I was able to squeeze in before Mom's bus arrived last night ... she did not walk in the door and exclaim, "Oh! What a delightfully clean house you have!!" In fact, her first comment was "Where is everyone?" She came to see the people who live here ... not the house. The second comment in reference to the cleanliness was, "Did you have a chance to wash off your cupboards ... or are we having breakfast on the deck?" (she had read my blog post pertaining to the dirt and grime that appeared when the sun shone through the back door) ... "I really like the idea of eating on the deck!" (slightly paraphrased but that was the gist of her lack of obsession about the dirt and grime around here).
I was dismayed when at first, it seemed that perhaps it was the dirt that was holding everything together around here.
When I took down the 'swag' that I have over the shower curtain, a piece of the wall came down along with the tension shower curtain rod. Oh no! Being unable to use the bathroom fan over the course of most of the winter (because it melted the snow on the roof and created an ice dam in the shingles and it was 'raining' through the light fixture in the front entrance) has created moisture issues of its own. This is only just the beginning. Mike Holmes! I need help...
Then ... when I went to put the same tension rod back up later, I stepped on the toilet so that I could reach high enough. And the toilet seat came off. Aaaack!!! Luckily my handy dandy fix-it skills are not lost to me. I did fix that without wanting to call on someone from the Home & Garden Network (though I do have a list started if Mike Holmes is wanting to know).
The blinds in the kitchen were amazingly clean in appearance which I found amazing because it took all of the elbow grease that I had in me, to scrub the grease off. I broke two slats on the blind when the job was near completion. Thankfully they are near the top and you don't notice (I tried taping one of them back together and that was a big fail ... I woke up in the middle of the night with the 'great idea' of stapling it instead).
So much, so very, very much has fallen into a state of disrepair around here. The walls need a fresh coat of paint. The paint on the cupboards, doors and baseboards has chipped in so many places I don't even know where to begin. The paint on the casings around the living room windows came off when I swiped it with my cleaning rag.
All I can do right now is clean. I put a dent on the endless list of things-to-do. I would be lying if I said I wasn't just a little bit happy with what I managed to accomplish yesterday. As Mom sat at the other end of the kitchen table oblivious to the 'before' look (in all honesty, things really don't look all that different), and telling me that she would rather spend the morning on the deck anyway ... my glance kept going toward the cleaned up areas of the kitchen. It felt better already.
My Youngest was quite unencouraging as I muttered about how I was 'wasting a perfectly good Saturday cleaning' when I wandered into his room. He approached me later and said when eventually he has a place of his own, he is only going to clean the parts that show when company comes over. That is exactly what I've been doing for the past four years. It is all that doesn't show that starts to take on a life of its own. Eventually.
Home maintenance and house cleaning are both best handled in small, regular doses. The list of things to fix, replace or maintain is growing by the minute (another disadvantage of housecleaning is that it brings to light all-things-in-a-state-of-disrepair). The list of things to clean is yet another Pandora's Box.
I was feeling pretty good about myself until I woke up this morning and opened a drawer in the bathroom. Ugh!! There are many more drawers and cupboards just like it. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there.
I am grateful to be back in a spot where I see our home as something more than a place of refuge after a hard day working at a job outside these doors. When hunkering down and gathering up your energy to face yet another day out in the trenches of life-outside-your-home, you (sometimes) simply don't have the energy to care about minor things such as the cobwebs that are hanging by your back door. Let alone the desire to waste your precious at-home-hours cleaning those cobwebs and other assorted nooks and crannies.
It feels good to care again. The energy is coming ...
I was dismayed when at first, it seemed that perhaps it was the dirt that was holding everything together around here.
When I took down the 'swag' that I have over the shower curtain, a piece of the wall came down along with the tension shower curtain rod. Oh no! Being unable to use the bathroom fan over the course of most of the winter (because it melted the snow on the roof and created an ice dam in the shingles and it was 'raining' through the light fixture in the front entrance) has created moisture issues of its own. This is only just the beginning. Mike Holmes! I need help...
Then ... when I went to put the same tension rod back up later, I stepped on the toilet so that I could reach high enough. And the toilet seat came off. Aaaack!!! Luckily my handy dandy fix-it skills are not lost to me. I did fix that without wanting to call on someone from the Home & Garden Network (though I do have a list started if Mike Holmes is wanting to know).
The blinds in the kitchen were amazingly clean in appearance which I found amazing because it took all of the elbow grease that I had in me, to scrub the grease off. I broke two slats on the blind when the job was near completion. Thankfully they are near the top and you don't notice (I tried taping one of them back together and that was a big fail ... I woke up in the middle of the night with the 'great idea' of stapling it instead).
So much, so very, very much has fallen into a state of disrepair around here. The walls need a fresh coat of paint. The paint on the cupboards, doors and baseboards has chipped in so many places I don't even know where to begin. The paint on the casings around the living room windows came off when I swiped it with my cleaning rag.
All I can do right now is clean. I put a dent on the endless list of things-to-do. I would be lying if I said I wasn't just a little bit happy with what I managed to accomplish yesterday. As Mom sat at the other end of the kitchen table oblivious to the 'before' look (in all honesty, things really don't look all that different), and telling me that she would rather spend the morning on the deck anyway ... my glance kept going toward the cleaned up areas of the kitchen. It felt better already.
My Youngest was quite unencouraging as I muttered about how I was 'wasting a perfectly good Saturday cleaning' when I wandered into his room. He approached me later and said when eventually he has a place of his own, he is only going to clean the parts that show when company comes over. That is exactly what I've been doing for the past four years. It is all that doesn't show that starts to take on a life of its own. Eventually.
Home maintenance and house cleaning are both best handled in small, regular doses. The list of things to fix, replace or maintain is growing by the minute (another disadvantage of housecleaning is that it brings to light all-things-in-a-state-of-disrepair). The list of things to clean is yet another Pandora's Box.
I was feeling pretty good about myself until I woke up this morning and opened a drawer in the bathroom. Ugh!! There are many more drawers and cupboards just like it. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there.
I am grateful to be back in a spot where I see our home as something more than a place of refuge after a hard day working at a job outside these doors. When hunkering down and gathering up your energy to face yet another day out in the trenches of life-outside-your-home, you (sometimes) simply don't have the energy to care about minor things such as the cobwebs that are hanging by your back door. Let alone the desire to waste your precious at-home-hours cleaning those cobwebs and other assorted nooks and crannies.
It feels good to care again. The energy is coming ...
Saturday, May 11, 2013
To Mothers Everywhere ... "Happy Mother's Day"
I'm having a little bit of Mother's Day Anxiety. I do a better job at living up to this occasion when I am not 'on location'. Writing a letter to tell Mom that I think she is pretty special? Easy! Sending a card to mark the occasion? Hallmark, you've made a few dollars off of my ability to carry through with that. Sending a gift in the mail? Receiving a parcel in the mail is a gift unto itself. It takes the pressure off of what is inside of the packaging. I can do that. I enjoy doing that. Especially when the gift is attached to no important date.
This year, my mom is coming here. Tonight. She will be waking up Mother's Day Morning. Here. In my house. With me. In person. What in the world can I do to live up to the pomp and circumstance of such an occasion? [heart rate goes up here].
First of all, my biggest gift to you will be whatever I can manage to clean, organize, buy and arrange before your bus arrives tonight. There is so much to do. And I have so much time to do it in. But I don't want to do it. The dirt and the dust and the clutter and the disorganization have grown so big and so tall that I don't know where to begin. Honestly? I want to begin by shutting out the sun. Then you can't see how dirty everything is. Perhaps this will be your gift to me. Your arrival will force me to move. To take one step in a forward direction. And start to move the mountains of dirt around here. One teaspoon full at a time. Thanks, Mom. I will be forever grateful.
Secondly, I had hoped that some deep and profound words would pour out of my fingertips this morning so that I could print this off and give it to you as a testament of my respect, honor and love that I have for you. I know that I don't do this as often as I used to, but I have done my best to convey my thoughts and feelings as I live and breathe them. I hope that I honor the mother that you have been, are, and forever will be ... by living my life in a way that makes you proud. I hope to raise my own family in a way that perpetuates the sense of family that we have among us. I am so grateful for the bonds within our family. I can see my own little family starting to emulate what they have grown up with and it makes my heart happy. Thanks, Mom ... for living your life the way that you do. For showing us that 'love' is a verb. I'll never forget the story about when a squabble among my two older sisters resulted in Mom telling one of her daughters to tell the other "I'm sorry". My sister simply couldn't do it. The best that she could muster was, "I can think it ... but I can't say it". Mom thought to herself "Good enough". It is better to think something and be truthful to yourself and the world around you, than to go off spouting empty words just because you have been told to do so. "I love you too, Mom" ...
Third, I don't have a gift for you. Perhaps as today unfolds, some physical token will present itself to me so that I have something for you to unwrap. But I don't do well under pressure. Let my gift to you be the unexpected gift that may have already arrived. Or the package that will find its way to you when I find something that speaks to me. Just because I don't have a gift doesn't mean that you aren't gifted. I hope that the day is a little bit special for you and I will do my best to help that happen. But I simply fold under pressure. Please forgive me. You don't have to say the words ... I will hear them if you feel them. Your unspoken vocabulary is far louder than you realize.
Fourth, I expect no more than I give this Mother's Day. To my own children ... no physical token is required. You give me gifts throughout the year without realizing that you are doing so.
To My Oldest - the last time you were over you shuddered just a little bit when you uttered the words (to me) that you can't believe how much you are like me. Yes ... you were talking aboutmy our obsession with pre-washing dishes before they go into the dishwasher. But the moment you said the words (again), I had an instant replay of the time you came home when you were driving your friends around in my car when you were a teen. Your friends were 'misbehaving' (I don't remember their exact actions but they were distracting you while you were driving in much the same way an out-of-control child can do) and you pulled the car over and stopped. You told them (something to the effect of) to settle down or get out. You quite physically shuddered when you told me this at the age of 16, "I can't believe it ... I'm turning into you!!"
Thank you. You have been listening all along. Your subconscious mind will remember some of thewisdom lessons that I have done my best to share with you. You will hear my 'voice' throughout your life. It may not seem like much right now but some day it will. Trust me. I know this. I cherish hearing Dad's words of wisdom when I need them the most. Mom may live five hours away but I am forever quoting her. May you remember the 'good stuff' and let the rest go. Please??
To my Second Son - you and I share a perspective about life and how we see it on a sporadic, yet somewhat regular basis. Having you back at home while you rerouted your life these past years has added alittle lot of the mundane day-to-day stuff to our lives. Neither one of us enjoys chit-chat on a regular basis. We tend to steer our energy towards 'real' conversations. We have had many. Most recently, was when we drove out to see Mom a month ago. I enjoy your perspective, your passion, your integrity and your honesty. You tell me truths that I may not always want to hear but you keep it 'real' around here. You see me - inside and out. The good, the bad and the ugly. And (I think) you still love me. Words are cheap around here. We don't say it out loud. We act in loving and respectful ways. I hear you too ...
Thank you. You make many, many days 'Mother's Day'. You do things without me asking you to. You do things when I ask too. I know it is ever-so-much-easier to do something when it is your choice ... I thank you for doing the 'hard stuff' when I know you'd rather take a memo and get back to me. You have been the 'Man About the House' that I have never had. Not since Dad ... not since Dad ... Thank you doesn't even begin to cover it.
To My Youngest - you are wise beyond your years. You have enveloped the characteristics of your older brothers and wove them into something unique and special within you. You have inherited and embraced the characteristics within your dad that I loved. You have only just begun yet I see the path that you are headed towards. You were the gift that I did not ask for, yet I received anyway. You talk with me about your days, your hopes and dreams ... yet you listen to me carry on about my mundane little stories too. You know of what I speak when I talk about my frustrations within my little daycare family. And you lead by example. I am learning from you ...
Thank you. You listen to my little rants. Oh, except for those times when you sort of shake your head a little bit after I've spoken a little too long without breathing and say, "What?" Yes. I know. I do it too. So did your dad ... so did your dad ... (please remember to honor that side of yourself). You are a patient and caring young man. You see beyond the obvious and you are looking ahead with your head secured tightly. No rose colored glasses perhaps, but the ability to see through the clear reality-tinted ones is a gift. Embrace it. When you look back on your life one day, I am wondering whose words of wisdom will come back to you. Mine? Or your own??
To My Mom - see what you have done? Do you see what I see and feel within my little family? This is the greatest gift that you have given to me. The ability to parent my children in the best way that I know how. I was a different parent to each of them at different parts of my life. I did the best I could with what I had at the time. My Oldest does not recognize me as the person who raised him. For that, I am both sorry and grateful. I'm grateful that I improved (?) with age ... but sorry that he was the one who took the brunt of my learning curve in the early years.
Thank you, Mom. Words can't begin to encompass my gratitude. But I try. I will continue to do my best to carry your wisdom and lessons and words within me. I promise to hang on and cherish the good stuff and let the rest go. We are imperfect people in an imperfect world. We teach our children what we know when we know it. But most of all ... we teach by example. Thank you for setting the example that you have set for me. Thank you for enduring the 'hard stuff' so that you can sit back on a day like Mother's Day and feel the goodness that you have created come back to you. May that be the gift that you receive. Not just from me. But from all of those who you have mothered along the way.
There you go, Hallmark. I did it my own way. I may not make greeting card brevity requirements, but I did what I set out to do (I think ... I must go back and reread this now!).
It is kind of nice to have a special day to honor your mom after all. No matter where she may be. We carry our moms within our hearts and we share what they gave us to those who touch our world. I think moms everywhere know this. May the moms who are looking down upon us feel all that we are feeling. Sometimes ... the words simply don't have to be said. They know. Because we feel it deeply and act accordingly. Please know and be comforted that your mom knows how you feel about her. Wherever she may be ....
This year, my mom is coming here. Tonight. She will be waking up Mother's Day Morning. Here. In my house. With me. In person. What in the world can I do to live up to the pomp and circumstance of such an occasion? [heart rate goes up here].
First of all, my biggest gift to you will be whatever I can manage to clean, organize, buy and arrange before your bus arrives tonight. There is so much to do. And I have so much time to do it in. But I don't want to do it. The dirt and the dust and the clutter and the disorganization have grown so big and so tall that I don't know where to begin. Honestly? I want to begin by shutting out the sun. Then you can't see how dirty everything is. Perhaps this will be your gift to me. Your arrival will force me to move. To take one step in a forward direction. And start to move the mountains of dirt around here. One teaspoon full at a time. Thanks, Mom. I will be forever grateful.
Secondly, I had hoped that some deep and profound words would pour out of my fingertips this morning so that I could print this off and give it to you as a testament of my respect, honor and love that I have for you. I know that I don't do this as often as I used to, but I have done my best to convey my thoughts and feelings as I live and breathe them. I hope that I honor the mother that you have been, are, and forever will be ... by living my life in a way that makes you proud. I hope to raise my own family in a way that perpetuates the sense of family that we have among us. I am so grateful for the bonds within our family. I can see my own little family starting to emulate what they have grown up with and it makes my heart happy. Thanks, Mom ... for living your life the way that you do. For showing us that 'love' is a verb. I'll never forget the story about when a squabble among my two older sisters resulted in Mom telling one of her daughters to tell the other "I'm sorry". My sister simply couldn't do it. The best that she could muster was, "I can think it ... but I can't say it". Mom thought to herself "Good enough". It is better to think something and be truthful to yourself and the world around you, than to go off spouting empty words just because you have been told to do so. "I love you too, Mom" ...
Third, I don't have a gift for you. Perhaps as today unfolds, some physical token will present itself to me so that I have something for you to unwrap. But I don't do well under pressure. Let my gift to you be the unexpected gift that may have already arrived. Or the package that will find its way to you when I find something that speaks to me. Just because I don't have a gift doesn't mean that you aren't gifted. I hope that the day is a little bit special for you and I will do my best to help that happen. But I simply fold under pressure. Please forgive me. You don't have to say the words ... I will hear them if you feel them. Your unspoken vocabulary is far louder than you realize.
Fourth, I expect no more than I give this Mother's Day. To my own children ... no physical token is required. You give me gifts throughout the year without realizing that you are doing so.
To My Oldest - the last time you were over you shuddered just a little bit when you uttered the words (to me) that you can't believe how much you are like me. Yes ... you were talking about
Thank you. You have been listening all along. Your subconscious mind will remember some of the
To my Second Son - you and I share a perspective about life and how we see it on a sporadic, yet somewhat regular basis. Having you back at home while you rerouted your life these past years has added a
Thank you. You make many, many days 'Mother's Day'. You do things without me asking you to. You do things when I ask too. I know it is ever-so-much-easier to do something when it is your choice ... I thank you for doing the 'hard stuff' when I know you'd rather take a memo and get back to me. You have been the 'Man About the House' that I have never had. Not since Dad ... not since Dad ... Thank you doesn't even begin to cover it.
To My Youngest - you are wise beyond your years. You have enveloped the characteristics of your older brothers and wove them into something unique and special within you. You have inherited and embraced the characteristics within your dad that I loved. You have only just begun yet I see the path that you are headed towards. You were the gift that I did not ask for, yet I received anyway. You talk with me about your days, your hopes and dreams ... yet you listen to me carry on about my mundane little stories too. You know of what I speak when I talk about my frustrations within my little daycare family. And you lead by example. I am learning from you ...
Thank you. You listen to my little rants. Oh, except for those times when you sort of shake your head a little bit after I've spoken a little too long without breathing and say, "What?" Yes. I know. I do it too. So did your dad ... so did your dad ... (please remember to honor that side of yourself). You are a patient and caring young man. You see beyond the obvious and you are looking ahead with your head secured tightly. No rose colored glasses perhaps, but the ability to see through the clear reality-tinted ones is a gift. Embrace it. When you look back on your life one day, I am wondering whose words of wisdom will come back to you. Mine? Or your own??
To My Mom - see what you have done? Do you see what I see and feel within my little family? This is the greatest gift that you have given to me. The ability to parent my children in the best way that I know how. I was a different parent to each of them at different parts of my life. I did the best I could with what I had at the time. My Oldest does not recognize me as the person who raised him. For that, I am both sorry and grateful. I'm grateful that I improved (?) with age ... but sorry that he was the one who took the brunt of my learning curve in the early years.
Thank you, Mom. Words can't begin to encompass my gratitude. But I try. I will continue to do my best to carry your wisdom and lessons and words within me. I promise to hang on and cherish the good stuff and let the rest go. We are imperfect people in an imperfect world. We teach our children what we know when we know it. But most of all ... we teach by example. Thank you for setting the example that you have set for me. Thank you for enduring the 'hard stuff' so that you can sit back on a day like Mother's Day and feel the goodness that you have created come back to you. May that be the gift that you receive. Not just from me. But from all of those who you have mothered along the way.
There you go, Hallmark. I did it my own way. I may not make greeting card brevity requirements, but I did what I set out to do (I think ... I must go back and reread this now!).
It is kind of nice to have a special day to honor your mom after all. No matter where she may be. We carry our moms within our hearts and we share what they gave us to those who touch our world. I think moms everywhere know this. May the moms who are looking down upon us feel all that we are feeling. Sometimes ... the words simply don't have to be said. They know. Because we feel it deeply and act accordingly. Please know and be comforted that your mom knows how you feel about her. Wherever she may be ....
Laugh Out Loud Moment on a Quiet Saturday Morning
This made me laugh out loud. Time and time again this morning. Click on this link to watch a segment from "Pumpcast News" on Jay Leno. It features a couple that not only 'jump to the pump' ... they do a little singing and dancing as well. This couple makes marriage look fun:
Part 1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNM0ENUCO5I&list=RD02j8E1DeS_JzM
Part 2 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8E1DeS_JzM
Part 1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNM0ENUCO5I&list=RD02j8E1DeS_JzM
Part 2 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8E1DeS_JzM
Thursday, May 9, 2013
I Would Have Forgotten to Go Dancing...
I walked inside after having supper on our newly constructed deck (and perhaps a Cooler or two) with My Son and it was 7:30 p.m. on a Thursday night...
It all started with an innocent question. I was reheating a (previously) barbecued hamburger in the oven. "Would you like one?" I asked. He asked if I would like fries. I asked if he would like to sit on the deck and have a drink ...
The next thing you know, it was 7:30 p.m. on a Thursday night. I looked at the clock and remembered what day of the week it was. All I could think was, "Thank goodness I didn't have a dance lesson tonight. I would have forgotten all about it."
This ... is what I love about my new/old life. No more flyers. I have almost used up all of the dance lessons that I have paid for. My weeknight commitments are almost non-existant.
And I'm loving it!!! I'm loving every moment.
It all started with an innocent question. I was reheating a (previously) barbecued hamburger in the oven. "Would you like one?" I asked. He asked if I would like fries. I asked if he would like to sit on the deck and have a drink ...
The next thing you know, it was 7:30 p.m. on a Thursday night. I looked at the clock and remembered what day of the week it was. All I could think was, "Thank goodness I didn't have a dance lesson tonight. I would have forgotten all about it."
This ... is what I love about my new/old life. No more flyers. I have almost used up all of the dance lessons that I have paid for. My weeknight commitments are almost non-existant.
And I'm loving it!!! I'm loving every moment.
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Independence Encouraged Here
I am a great believer in providing children a safe, comfortable environment surrounded with opportunities to play, learn, adapt and grow within my daycare. Most of all, I try to encourage age-appropriate independence.
I have endeavored to collect toys that will grow with the kids and provide 'accidental learning' through play. I interject electronic gadgets into the mix but it isn't all about computer games. We watch some TV but I like to steer towards programs that teach values or lessons or learning.
I like to stand on the sidelines and guide them towards fair play and being kind verses sitting-on-the-floor and actually playing with the kids. This is how I have raised my own kids. I have two full-grown children and one semi-grown advanced teen as my testament that 'my way' is not a bad way to raise a child.
I am feeling a little challenged within my present-day-daycare situation. I take care of three children under the age of three. Two of these children have no other siblings and the third child has siblings that are about ten years older than her. Enter my part-time Kindergarten child who is the youngest child within his own family and all of his cousins on all sides of his family. I am surrounded by children who are a little bit used to the world revolving around them.
My three little ones, under the age of three are growing up together. They are interacting with each other within their days and life-at-daycare. It isn't 'all about them' here. They are part of a family. We have had some growing pains ... but I think we are headed in a good direction.
Enter my Kindergarten Guy. I was updating my daycare blog this morning and it wasn't until my fingers were telling the story of our day, that I realized that it didn't matter what I chose to do with our day ... Kindergarten Guy was not impressed.
He doesn't like daycare. He doesn't enjoy being around 'babies' (he isn't used to being the oldest). He doesn't enjoy walks. So I diverted our walk into 'Lunch at McDonald's'. I thought having a destination in mind would curb the complaining (walking to the mailbox a few blocks away was too far at first). And it worked. He didn't voice a negative word as we made our way down the city streets en route to our lunch destination.
But it was the 'adventure' that we could have had on our way home that makes me sit back and scratch my head.
We wandered through Petland. He held his nose and hated every moment of it. We were being shadowed by a store employee that gave off vibes of not trusting me to ensure my kids behaved in an animal-appropriate ways, so I was just as glad to get out of the store as my Kindergarten Guy was ...
We cut through the mall and I let the kids sit in the various coin operated 'rides' they have scattered throughout the mall. Kindergarten Guy didn't want to 'embarrass himself', so he trailed along his younger companion and went where he went ... but seemed determined not to have fun.
We stopped at a park that was on our shortcut back home. A dog scared Kindergarten Guy. He is afraid of animals. All animals (his fear is greatly exaggerated when he has an audience).
After that excitement, the boys stood atop of the play structure. The playground was not age appropriate for my little guy, but Kindergarten Guy simply stood there too.
At that point, there was little left to do than go home. And we did.
This little guy is not yet six years old but he makes being a 'child' look like very hard work. He plops himself down on the couch and has the look of "I'm here. It is now your job to impress me ..." about him. What will he remember when he looks back on being a child? Will he hear laughter in his memories? Will he remember using his imagination and creating his own fun? Or will it be all about the world around him creating the fun and enjoyment for him?
What is happening to our children? Are we taking away their creativity by filling every moment of every day with something to stimulate them so much that they are not learning the joy of using their imagination through plain old ordinary 'play'?
I am not climbing on a soap box here and saying what I think is right or justified or the only way. It is just what I am seeing through my own tunnel vision here within my little daycare world.
I will continue to do what I am doing. I will guide these children to play together and apart independently, fairly and within a safe, clean and comfortable environment. My goal is to do my part in creating 'good citizens' when they go out into this big, brave world. I strive to help them build their independent thinking skills. Because there is nothing more scary (to me) than sending a child out into the world without their own reasoning skills and 'free will' highly developed.
As I tell my 2-1/2 year old little guy each and every day:
I encourage independence here. Independent play. Independent thinking. Fair play and respecting others. These are good rules to follow no matter how old you get.
I have endeavored to collect toys that will grow with the kids and provide 'accidental learning' through play. I interject electronic gadgets into the mix but it isn't all about computer games. We watch some TV but I like to steer towards programs that teach values or lessons or learning.
I like to stand on the sidelines and guide them towards fair play and being kind verses sitting-on-the-floor and actually playing with the kids. This is how I have raised my own kids. I have two full-grown children and one semi-grown advanced teen as my testament that 'my way' is not a bad way to raise a child.
I am feeling a little challenged within my present-day-daycare situation. I take care of three children under the age of three. Two of these children have no other siblings and the third child has siblings that are about ten years older than her. Enter my part-time Kindergarten child who is the youngest child within his own family and all of his cousins on all sides of his family. I am surrounded by children who are a little bit used to the world revolving around them.
My three little ones, under the age of three are growing up together. They are interacting with each other within their days and life-at-daycare. It isn't 'all about them' here. They are part of a family. We have had some growing pains ... but I think we are headed in a good direction.
Enter my Kindergarten Guy. I was updating my daycare blog this morning and it wasn't until my fingers were telling the story of our day, that I realized that it didn't matter what I chose to do with our day ... Kindergarten Guy was not impressed.
He doesn't like daycare. He doesn't enjoy being around 'babies' (he isn't used to being the oldest). He doesn't enjoy walks. So I diverted our walk into 'Lunch at McDonald's'. I thought having a destination in mind would curb the complaining (walking to the mailbox a few blocks away was too far at first). And it worked. He didn't voice a negative word as we made our way down the city streets en route to our lunch destination.
But it was the 'adventure' that we could have had on our way home that makes me sit back and scratch my head.
We wandered through Petland. He held his nose and hated every moment of it. We were being shadowed by a store employee that gave off vibes of not trusting me to ensure my kids behaved in an animal-appropriate ways, so I was just as glad to get out of the store as my Kindergarten Guy was ...
We cut through the mall and I let the kids sit in the various coin operated 'rides' they have scattered throughout the mall. Kindergarten Guy didn't want to 'embarrass himself', so he trailed along his younger companion and went where he went ... but seemed determined not to have fun.
We stopped at a park that was on our shortcut back home. A dog scared Kindergarten Guy. He is afraid of animals. All animals (his fear is greatly exaggerated when he has an audience).
After that excitement, the boys stood atop of the play structure. The playground was not age appropriate for my little guy, but Kindergarten Guy simply stood there too.
At that point, there was little left to do than go home. And we did.
This little guy is not yet six years old but he makes being a 'child' look like very hard work. He plops himself down on the couch and has the look of "I'm here. It is now your job to impress me ..." about him. What will he remember when he looks back on being a child? Will he hear laughter in his memories? Will he remember using his imagination and creating his own fun? Or will it be all about the world around him creating the fun and enjoyment for him?
What is happening to our children? Are we taking away their creativity by filling every moment of every day with something to stimulate them so much that they are not learning the joy of using their imagination through plain old ordinary 'play'?
I am not climbing on a soap box here and saying what I think is right or justified or the only way. It is just what I am seeing through my own tunnel vision here within my little daycare world.
I will continue to do what I am doing. I will guide these children to play together and apart independently, fairly and within a safe, clean and comfortable environment. My goal is to do my part in creating 'good citizens' when they go out into this big, brave world. I strive to help them build their independent thinking skills. Because there is nothing more scary (to me) than sending a child out into the world without their own reasoning skills and 'free will' highly developed.
As I tell my 2-1/2 year old little guy each and every day:
- "Think"
- "Use your own brain"
- "Be a leader"
- "You can teach the little ones what you know"
- "You are the best little two-year-old that I know!"
- "Just be yourself" ...
I encourage independence here. Independent play. Independent thinking. Fair play and respecting others. These are good rules to follow no matter how old you get.
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Let the Sun Shine In!!! (or not)
Due to the lack of kids here today, we have been able to leave the back door open and let the sun shine into our day with all of its glory.
The sun has brought to light, that which I have known all along. This house is dirty. Very dirty.
When that very same door is shut, the natural light come in via a north window (aka: indirect sunlight no matter what the time of day). When the door is open? The morning sun from the east shines brightly.
Oh! The screen door was a mess. That was easy. I cleaned that up while my 2-1/2 year old ate his breakfast. Once that was clean, the kitchen looked worse than it did before I started.
The dirt and grime on the screen door glass must have diluted the natural sunlight by an iota. Because when I turned around, all I could see was the water marks left behind on the dishwasher, stove, fridge and cupboards. Don't even let me get started on the blinds and kitchen window.
I have company coming this weekend and the kitchen is disgusting. If I keep the back door closed I may be able to get away with a minimal amount of scrubbing and scouring. If we have breakfast on the deck, go out for a while and return home after the sun has moved in a westward direction ... that could work. Maybe it will be cloudy and the sun won't tell the tale of my unkempt house ...
Then again ... maybe I could just clean things up around here. The sad part is that there is quite literally no end to the dirt that has been evading the sunlight. It is everywhere.
Maybe I'll take the kids outside to play for a while instead.
The sun has brought to light, that which I have known all along. This house is dirty. Very dirty.
When that very same door is shut, the natural light come in via a north window (aka: indirect sunlight no matter what the time of day). When the door is open? The morning sun from the east shines brightly.
Oh! The screen door was a mess. That was easy. I cleaned that up while my 2-1/2 year old ate his breakfast. Once that was clean, the kitchen looked worse than it did before I started.
The dirt and grime on the screen door glass must have diluted the natural sunlight by an iota. Because when I turned around, all I could see was the water marks left behind on the dishwasher, stove, fridge and cupboards. Don't even let me get started on the blinds and kitchen window.
I have company coming this weekend and the kitchen is disgusting. If I keep the back door closed I may be able to get away with a minimal amount of scrubbing and scouring. If we have breakfast on the deck, go out for a while and return home after the sun has moved in a westward direction ... that could work. Maybe it will be cloudy and the sun won't tell the tale of my unkempt house ...
Then again ... maybe I could just clean things up around here. The sad part is that there is quite literally no end to the dirt that has been evading the sunlight. It is everywhere.
Maybe I'll take the kids outside to play for a while instead.
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