You Are Exactly Where You Are Meant to Be

"May today there be peace within you

May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be ..."

~St. Teresa's Prayer

Trust.

How can one feel safe in the knowledge that no matter what you are enduring at this moment in time, is 'exactly where you are meant to be'?

By looking back. It is often only in retrospect, that we can find the value of enduring the unthinkable.

There is not one incident in my life that hasn't taught me something that I needed to learn.

A lesson in heart ache taught me that I knew how to love. A lesson in personal loss taught me that I need to appreciate and acknowledge those that touch my life. A lesson in material loss taught me that 'things' don't matter. The lessons of parenthood? I'm still learning ...

I have had the gift of a heart-to-heart conversation with my two oldest sons this week. We talked about many things. Each of them has had their own 'mountain to climb' in dealing with the emotional aftermath of incidents personal to them. Each of them gave me the gift of telling me one way in which I have set an example for them. Defining moments in my life, that my children saw and remembered, made a difference in the way they see me now.

We are all individual in our abilities to cope.

Some of us bounce back quicker than others. The visual picture of an inflatable punching bag comes to mind. I like to think of myself as one who has the ability to keep standing in the face of adversity.

Other times? It's like the wind is knocked right out of us and some resuscitation is required. A little CPR for the soul.

If only it was as simple as having someone else breathe the air back into you. Maybe it's necessary at first, but it is important to breathe on your own. You must be able to stand alone and not be hooked up to 'life' support. Support can be taken away.

I can't stress enough just how important it is to have the ability to stand on your own. A healthy relationship can't happen if one person is relying on another, to 'make' them happy. To be the person that another is relying on, is exhausting. Eventually that person becomes depleted. When that person is 'empty' ... what happens?

I've found myself in relationships that have drained me of everything that I was. Survival skills kicked in and I did what it took to save myself. I left the relationship. It's not easy to walk away from what you had believed was 'forever'. You have to redefine and rebuild yourself and your life. There were many times that I didn't like where I was in life. But those times changed me.

The unfortunate part of that equation is that there are two people in a relationship. The other party is also in a place that they don't want to be. That is also their moment of truth. What you do in those moments builds character.

There are escapes. Blame, 'drugs of choice', denial, anger ... but what is underneath all that is numbing you from what is hurting? You.

This is exactly where you are meant to be. It isn't easy. It hurts like heck. There are no easy answers.

Trust. Believe that you must be in 'this place'. Confront it. Learn from it. Do what has to be done. Endure it. And take one step.

One step in a forward direction will start you on a path that leads you to where you need to go ...



"I may have felt like a punching bag from time to time in my life. But ... just like Bozo, I just kept bouncing back.

Be resilient to life. Learn from it and keep going back for the next round.

The best is yet to come!"
~Me