Monday, September 5, 2016

Monday's Musings

Instead of sitting here one more day, waiting for deep thoughts, perspective and inspiration to hit me like a ton of bricks, I am simply going to sit still and type for a while. I'm going to "show up before I'm ready", as per Glennon Melton Doyle's advise.

I have been "sitting still" and reading, watching and listening to Glennon this morning. I wish she was aware of what good friends we have become but somehow I think I'm lost in the masses who adore and admire her. I look to her for inspiration and perspective. I think we could sit down and be friends (as I'm certain anyone who absorbs what she writes feels). I am not alone when I sit still with Glennon. She fills me up when I am empty. She makes me feel perfect within my imperfections. She makes me appreciate the blessing it is to be "human" and all it entails. She makes me think and strive to do "the next right thing"...

Yes, Glennon "makes" me do a lot, doesn't she? She is one of those friends you know bring out the best and finest within you. If you simply follow one of her strategies or incorporate one of her many "Glennonisms" into your inner dialogue, you will start to become more of who you are meant to be.

I am one week away from the beginning of a new online course hosted by Glennon and her friend "Brené Brown". Yes! "The Wisdom of Story" is Brené's newest online course, with the suggested reading "Love Warrior" (Glennon Doyle Melton's new book which is being released tomorrow). Add this great news to the fact that Glennon will be Oprah's guest on "Super Soul Sunday" on OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network) on September 11th and you can only imagine my elation to be so saturated with all things "Glennon", with a side order of Brené and Oprah!

Yes, I am hyped. Yes, I am ready. Yes, I need another infusion of positivity, enthusiasm and a shot of inspiration to propel me forward and through this phase of life I seem to be finding uncomfortable and hard to push through.

I have squandered an entire long weekend. I knew I should have done the "hard things" first. But I didn't. I turned on the TV instead. I got lost in my Gilmore Girl marathon and when I tired of that, I tuned into the Home and Garden Network to lose myself in the idea of rebuilding, renovating and making the most of the home I already have. And I did nothing.

I try to tell myself that I needed this long weekend to do whatever I felt like doing. This has been my version of rest and relaxation. But deep inside, I know that what I chose to fill myself up with was akin to drugs, alcohol, food and overspending. I was filling a void within by watching mindless TV, when what I needed to be doing was starting small and dealing with the mountains of "undone" tasks in and around our home. I needed to simply do the "next right thing" even if that right thing is not going to change the world.

I am committed to 16 full weeks of daycare before I hang up my daycare cape. Sixteen weeks to cull through the excess and downsize. Sixteen weeks to reimagine our home without a daycare within. Sixteen weeks to reroute my thoughts, my future and my finances. Sixteen weeks to dream of a new future with me driving my own "train". Glennon tells me I should not lose myself in my roles within my life, but instead I am to envision I am a train and I unload and take on new cargo as I go along. Glennon defines herself as a "Child of God". I am unsure how I define myself. Perhaps that is why my train feels like it is simply going in circles. My cargo is getting to be too heavy because I keep adding to my load without off-loading anything along the way.

My new vision is an empty downstairs play room. What will replace that void? My new vision leaves me three empty bedrooms upstairs. Is this why I keep falling back on the idea of renting out some of the space within this house of ours? My new vision has some blank spaces that may or may not need to be filled. Since I was seriously considering taking a year's "leave of absence" from the world of work so I could find myself, my passion and my drive again, is it possible for me to reduce my work week so I can have the best of both worlds? My new vision includes a more contented self. Will a week of not being driven by the needs of one to three year olds increase my attention span? Or will I need to disconnect from my cell phone, Internet and all social media to succeed at that?

My new vision of my life includes incorporating habits I can start doing immediately. Turning off the computer, walking away from my cell phone, turning off the TV, walking, reaching out to people more often and carving out time to write. These are a few of my must-do items in order to feel and live life more genuinely.

Maybe that is a little harsh. I may not be able to successfully disconnect from the world but I could definitely work within some guidelines. Reducing my screen time (including that time which I spend in front of the television screen) will enhance my life greatly. I was a better daycare provider, friend, writer, mover and shaker when the Internet, TV and cell phone weren't always on and buzzing in my face and in the background of my days.

I think I know where I must start. But I don't have the strength to rid myself of the TV in my bedroom oasis right now. But I could start in the playroom. It is filled with items which others may need and use more than I. It is a very good place to start.

But in the meantime, if you haven't banished yourself from "screen time", may I direct you towards some places which I have found inspiration, ambition and a little bit of courage?

Click here to read about the story of Glennon meeting her new warrior friend and her upcoming appearance on "Super Soul Sunday".

Click here to learn a little bit about the upcoming course "The Wisdom of Story" with Glennon and Brené.


Click here to find out if Glennon's new book "Love Warrior" is something you would like to read

But if you simply want to sit back and be entertained and inspired, here is one of Glennon's first videos I ever watched. Her TEDx talk:


May your day be inspired and filled with exactly what you need right now. "Happy Monday" to you.

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