My day got fast forwarded a little bit today when my 2:30 appointment got bumped ahead to 10:30. Some appointments are nice to put behind you and this was one of them.
It was 12 years ago that I had my first colonoscopy. Back then, colon cancer and body parts in that region of the body simply weren't talked about. I didn't tell a soul what was happening to me at that time, but I had been ignoring symptoms for close to 5 years. I was alone and scared. I thought I had cancer. The certainty came from what I knew was happening within my body and all of the years that I kept the information to myself.
I remember thinking at the time, that this was one area of the body that was not discussed in a public forum. A lot of cancers in private areas of the body were readily talked about. But not this. A lot has changed since then.
There is an awareness of colon cancer now. I recall when a public figure died of it and his wife (who was a co host on a morning news show) devoted a week to bringing this disease out of the closet. I breathed a huge sigh of relief when the stigma attached to talking of this particular cancer started to feel as commonplace as talking about breast cancer. Awareness = education. Many lives have probably been saved as a result of this.
In my case, all was fine. The polyp they found 12 years ago was not cancerous and there have been no other indications of problems in any of my other follow up appointments. When I went for my regularly scheduled check up today, I would have been shocked if they had told me anything other than what I already knew. That everything is fine and they will see me again in another 5 years.
Our family now discusses our tendency to have problems in this area. At least 2 other family members have had polyps removed and 2 others have had cancers in this region of the body.
12 years ago, I was asked if anyone in my family had colon cancer or any type of health issues of this nature. I kind of laughed and said, "No, and I can't imagine anyone talking about it if they did!" I was asked the same thing today and I revised my answer according to what I now know about my family but I did say that prior to this time, if anyone else had this health issue we didn't know about it. The nurse readily agreed that it was not something that was talked about openly even 10 years ago.
I have spent the afternoon sleeping off the sedative. I think they gave me an ultra large dose of it because I have always been conscious and aware of what was happening every other time I've had this test. This time I remember talking to the doctor and the next thing I knew, I was waking up in the recovery area. I was not completely of sound mind and body when I got lost walking out of the hospital, but eventually I found the door that I was looking for and a cab drove up to take me home. I think it was heaven-sent.
It is a good feeling to have that behind me for another 5 years. But it is even a better feeling to walk in those doors, with the absolute certainty that I am in good health and they weren't going to find anything to dispute that inner known fact.
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