Parenting 101

Parenting is a scary job at times.

My Youngest Son's grade 6 class took part in a 'Drug Awareness and Healthy Lifestyles Day' yesterday afternoon. What a perfect age to talk to impressionable young people.

He brought home a book on drug safety. I quickly leafed through it, and then started reading it from the beginning. There is a wealth of information is contained within the covers.

It starts by talking about cigarettes and alcohol. The top two drugs of choice. And then it gets into other drugs. There are a lot of things that I don't know and I'm so grateful for the school system for bringing this information into our home.

Drugs scare me.

When I was young, I remember watching something on TV that showed people thinking that they could fly ... because they were on drugs. There was some conversation about this in our home and I don't remember exactly what was said. But the fear was instilled. DON'T DO DRUGS.

Mom and Dad both smoked. I distinctly remember Dad telling me "Don't ever start ... because once you start, it's (almost) impossible to quit." School taught us what smoking did to your body and I tried to convince Mom and Dad to quit smoking. They taught by example, just how hard it is to stop. So I never started.

I felt surrounded in addiction when I was married. My husband had an addictive nature, his/our friends were all caught up in drinking and partying. From where I sat, it felt like addictions were ruling people's lives. I got caught up in living a life where you did what you had to do, to cope. I barely recognize the person that I was at that time. But those years taught me about the temptation and desire to use alcohol to escape reality.

I escaped that lifestyle and started a brand new life with my young family. I carried within me, the knowledge of the addictive tendencies that was part of the gene pool that my young sons had inherited. The teen years were scary.

I remember finding drugs in the house. I was beyond frightened. I called a help-line and asked for their advice. The only thing that I remember about that conversation is what they told me my son would say when I confronted him. He didn't disappoint. He said word for word, what they had predicted he would say.

How did I handle the situation? I believe that 'freaked out' would probably be the most apt words. Did I handle it correctly? No. Suspicion was rooted within me and trust issues that were already shaky got worse.

My Other Son handled the peer pressure of those teen years completely differently. He was solid in his convictions and said 'NO' to everything. Cigarettes, drugs ... (I'm not quite certain about alcohol but it was never an issue at the time). He wasn't winning any popularity contests, but I was so relieved to have him home with me on weekends and not caught up with a crowd that was clouding his judgement. He may not have those 'happy' teen memories ... but at least he shouldn't have any regrets.

Enter My Youngest. Here we go again.

As we briefly talked about the facts he had learned at school, I heard him voice the same fear that I had within me, when it came to drugs. I reiterated the story of His Older Brother's attitude about drugs when he was a teen. The fact that he said 'NO' to everything and he didn't care what his friends thought. He was strong in his beliefs about right and wrong when it came to things-of-an-addictive-nature. He held onto what he believed was right, even though it was a hard thing to do.

There is a DVD that came with this informative book. I know that we will be sitting down and watching that together. We talk easily of many things and I want the topic of drugs and peer pressure to be on the table now. Before he gets any older.

I don't know the secret of keeping my children safe. But I do know that the ability to talk about anything and everything is vital.

This is my third shot at raising an up and coming teenage boy. I look at my adult sons and I'm grateful that we all survived the teen years.

Does the learning ever end?