I must stay home tonight. And for the better half of tomorrow too. My Youngest is hosting a 'Birthday Sleepover' tonight and my role is easy. I must pick up a birthday cake and order pizza. Snacks and drinks have already been bought. I just have to be here. At home.
I have been gadding about far too much lately. It is exhausting. Even my daycare days seem to revolve around our daily walks (which take us out of the house for two or three hours at a time).
So the mere idea of being home-bound tonight and tomorrow makes me happy, happy, happy! What to do? What to do??
Unfortunately I have some bookkeeping work that must be done. I have been procrastinating long enough. That little pile of work has been shuffled onto and off of the kitchen table more often than I set the table for a meal. My work has made a lot of miles around this house but I have yet to open that little Pandora's file folder and tackle it. I must do that. First! So I can enjoy the remainder of my hours at home.
Then there are those books that have been begging to be read. My problem is that "Reading = Sleeping", so books continue to paralyze me. Maybe I will read. Maybe I won't.
There is yard work to do. Nothing fancy. Just mowing the lawn, weed control and a little trimming. Then again, rain is in the forecast. Maybe that will get done. Maybe it won't.
The exciting part for me, is that all options revolve around being home-bound. I don't really care what I accomplish. The reward and satisfaction comes from being home. And staying here. There is truly no place in the world that I would rather be.
I know what a gift that I have. To have a home that is an oasis to me. Once again, I can say with all honesty "Everything that is important to me, is contained within these four walls. My family. My work. My life. It is all within arm's reach."
Be it ever so humble, there is no place like home ...
Friday, June 7, 2013
Thursday, June 6, 2013
New Math and Budgeting ~ Does it All Work Out in the End?
Am I spending too much money these days?? That is the question.
I wandered over to our neighborhood Canadian Tire with my Daycare Family a few days ago. There were a few items on my list that I thought I may be able to find there. One of those items happened to be grass shears.
I found what I was looking for but was aghast at the price. Twenty dollars?!? I don't shop for these kind of items often, but I thought that was a little steep. There were others that cost more, but $20.00 was the cheapest that I could find. I decided to leave those on the shelf and look a little before I lept. That night, I went to WalMart. I found the shears I was after. For $10.00. Half of the cost. I saved myself $10.00 by not being impulsive. Yay, me!!
So last night, I went out and spent the $10.00 I saved on a used tricycle for my daycare family. Did I save money in the end? Or did I just spend $20.00 too much?
We adopted a cat. He is an adorable cat with a likable, outgoing personality. His 'two week trial period' ends on Saturday. And he is 'broken'. He has had diarrhea since we adopted him. He has an eye that we have been doctoring. His previous owner has connections with a vet that supplies her with (perhaps expired?) medications. So we have been following her advise and doctoring him as she suggests. And nothing has really changed.
I can't afford to adopt a cat with ongoing medical bills. But we like him. We really like him. He shows absolutely no outward symptoms of feeling badly. His litter box says otherwise, but he is vibrant, energetic and his fur is shiny and he is the picture of health. I booked an appointment for him to see our vet. $65.00 for the check up, plus $70 - $90 for any blood work (with the possibility of an additional $20 in courier costs if they needed to send anything out) and that doesn't even include the cost of any medication they may suggest.
This morning? I am going to cancel that appointment. Instead, I shall call the person I adopted him from and talk to her about the possibility of having her vet check him out instead (if his problems persist). Instinct tells me that his symptoms are stress induced. He is a jumpy cat. I think his stomach is settling in to his new home and family. I have a stomach like that. He is acting healthy in every other way. I think I'll save those vet costs for another day ...
But tonight? I am off to buy another tricycle for our daycare. Grand total spent - $10.00. Hmmm ... a savings of almost $200.00 on present day vet costs (future costs unknown) verses current spending of $10.00. It sounds good this morning. How will this compute in the future?
My car has been leaking automatic transmission fluid ever since I had it flushed and changed at my last oil change. I checked the level regularly but since the level continued to be fine, I guessed that maybe they had over-filled it when they changed it. What do I know?
Finally, the level dipped to the 'add' level on the dip stick. Then my son told me that I should check this level while the car is running. The fluid barely reached the bottom of the dip stick when I checked it properly. Whoops...
I called my friendly neighborhood mechanic yesterday morning to see if they could check this out for me. They were happy to accommodate me, only they were booked until Monday. Meanwhile, I had this running commentary going on in the back of my mind. I am getting a new fence. What if the car breaks down? What if the furnace or air conditioner or anything else major needs to be replaced or fixed around the house? Do I have a contingency plan in place???
So ... last night, I stopped in at the place that flushed my transmission (back in February) and told my little leakage story (and why I had delayed coming by sooner). I honestly thought that any 'warranty' on the work that they did four months ago would have expired. But after hearing me out, they were happy to check into my problem. Immediately. Within the hour, they found and rectified the problem. They topped up my transmission fluid and sent me on my way. It didn't cost a penny.
There we go! Crisis averted (today). Money saved for another day? Can you 'save' money that you didn't have in the first place?!??
So tonight? If that Little Tykes ride-in car is still for sale? I just may add that to our Daycare Inventory ...
What I save on one hand (by not purchasing that-which-I-really-couldn't-afford-in-the-first-place), I am spending on the other. Is this what they call new math? Am I digging myself into a hole with this thinking?
I may be in the hole ... but I will have a nice new fence around it!
I wandered over to our neighborhood Canadian Tire with my Daycare Family a few days ago. There were a few items on my list that I thought I may be able to find there. One of those items happened to be grass shears.
I found what I was looking for but was aghast at the price. Twenty dollars?!? I don't shop for these kind of items often, but I thought that was a little steep. There were others that cost more, but $20.00 was the cheapest that I could find. I decided to leave those on the shelf and look a little before I lept. That night, I went to WalMart. I found the shears I was after. For $10.00. Half of the cost. I saved myself $10.00 by not being impulsive. Yay, me!!
So last night, I went out and spent the $10.00 I saved on a used tricycle for my daycare family. Did I save money in the end? Or did I just spend $20.00 too much?
We adopted a cat. He is an adorable cat with a likable, outgoing personality. His 'two week trial period' ends on Saturday. And he is 'broken'. He has had diarrhea since we adopted him. He has an eye that we have been doctoring. His previous owner has connections with a vet that supplies her with (perhaps expired?) medications. So we have been following her advise and doctoring him as she suggests. And nothing has really changed.
I can't afford to adopt a cat with ongoing medical bills. But we like him. We really like him. He shows absolutely no outward symptoms of feeling badly. His litter box says otherwise, but he is vibrant, energetic and his fur is shiny and he is the picture of health. I booked an appointment for him to see our vet. $65.00 for the check up, plus $70 - $90 for any blood work (with the possibility of an additional $20 in courier costs if they needed to send anything out) and that doesn't even include the cost of any medication they may suggest.
This morning? I am going to cancel that appointment. Instead, I shall call the person I adopted him from and talk to her about the possibility of having her vet check him out instead (if his problems persist). Instinct tells me that his symptoms are stress induced. He is a jumpy cat. I think his stomach is settling in to his new home and family. I have a stomach like that. He is acting healthy in every other way. I think I'll save those vet costs for another day ...
But tonight? I am off to buy another tricycle for our daycare. Grand total spent - $10.00. Hmmm ... a savings of almost $200.00 on present day vet costs (future costs unknown) verses current spending of $10.00. It sounds good this morning. How will this compute in the future?
My car has been leaking automatic transmission fluid ever since I had it flushed and changed at my last oil change. I checked the level regularly but since the level continued to be fine, I guessed that maybe they had over-filled it when they changed it. What do I know?
Finally, the level dipped to the 'add' level on the dip stick. Then my son told me that I should check this level while the car is running. The fluid barely reached the bottom of the dip stick when I checked it properly. Whoops...
I called my friendly neighborhood mechanic yesterday morning to see if they could check this out for me. They were happy to accommodate me, only they were booked until Monday. Meanwhile, I had this running commentary going on in the back of my mind. I am getting a new fence. What if the car breaks down? What if the furnace or air conditioner or anything else major needs to be replaced or fixed around the house? Do I have a contingency plan in place???
So ... last night, I stopped in at the place that flushed my transmission (back in February) and told my little leakage story (and why I had delayed coming by sooner). I honestly thought that any 'warranty' on the work that they did four months ago would have expired. But after hearing me out, they were happy to check into my problem. Immediately. Within the hour, they found and rectified the problem. They topped up my transmission fluid and sent me on my way. It didn't cost a penny.
There we go! Crisis averted (today). Money saved for another day? Can you 'save' money that you didn't have in the first place?!??
So tonight? If that Little Tykes ride-in car is still for sale? I just may add that to our Daycare Inventory ...
What I save on one hand (by not purchasing that-which-I-really-couldn't-afford-in-the-first-place), I am spending on the other. Is this what they call new math? Am I digging myself into a hole with this thinking?
I may be in the hole ... but I will have a nice new fence around it!
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
This 'Motivation Thing' ... is Exhausting!
Okay, okay. I know it has been a while since I've actually felt excited about cleaning and organizing. But honestly! This could wear a girl out!!
Yesterday, I started trying to 'clean' the sand in our 10.5 X 15 ft sandbox. There is a lot of sand in there. A lot!!
Our neighbor's fir tree has been shedding pine needles and pine cones into our sandbox without human intervention for three years (while I took my hiatus from babysitting). It has been busy. So ... I have taken one of those sandbox 'sifting toys' and a toy shovel and I have been sifting sand when I haven't been digging up dandelions.
I was attempting to show the kids how much more comfortable it is to play in the shade. So I 'played' in the shade (sifting sand) to set a good example.
In fact, I 'played' in the sandbox for a few extra hours after the kids left last night. It was intoxicating to see myself make some progress in this never-ending job. I actually felt excited about cleaning sand!
I haven't gotten this dirty and sweaty on such a regular basis in a very, very long time. I guess this was long overdue. But it is just a tad wearing on a person. Especially when you can't sleep at night. Perhaps breathing in excessive dirt and sand is not the best thing to do when you are fighting a cough??
The other downfall about cleaning is that it makes for boring writing. I'll try to clean a little less today and reflect a little more. Maybe it will bring some depth into tomorrow morning's post.
Yesterday, I started trying to 'clean' the sand in our 10.5 X 15 ft sandbox. There is a lot of sand in there. A lot!!
Our neighbor's fir tree has been shedding pine needles and pine cones into our sandbox without human intervention for three years (while I took my hiatus from babysitting). It has been busy. So ... I have taken one of those sandbox 'sifting toys' and a toy shovel and I have been sifting sand when I haven't been digging up dandelions.
I was attempting to show the kids how much more comfortable it is to play in the shade. So I 'played' in the shade (sifting sand) to set a good example.
In fact, I 'played' in the sandbox for a few extra hours after the kids left last night. It was intoxicating to see myself make some progress in this never-ending job. I actually felt excited about cleaning sand!
I haven't gotten this dirty and sweaty on such a regular basis in a very, very long time. I guess this was long overdue. But it is just a tad wearing on a person. Especially when you can't sleep at night. Perhaps breathing in excessive dirt and sand is not the best thing to do when you are fighting a cough??
The other downfall about cleaning is that it makes for boring writing. I'll try to clean a little less today and reflect a little more. Maybe it will bring some depth into tomorrow morning's post.
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
The Cat's Got My Tongue Today ...
I can't think too hard this morning. I tried. It isn't working.
What do I do when I have moments like this? I lose myself watching our cats ...
You never know what you may capture when you videotape animals and children. This was simply a moment when I noticed 'Ray' (our New Cat) chasing his tail. It is nothing. But it is everything.
Cats have a way of quietly amusing themselves. Whether it is watching invisible dust particles in the air ... or gazing out the window ... or simply curled up in a tight little ball and making 'sleep' look like a sport ... I simply love to watch our cat(s).
Yesterday morning there was a moment of flying black fur that happened too fast to record. Ray was racing around the living room. Andre (our Old Cat) was doing his best impression of playing. For the most part, he stays in one place while Ray races past him.
Picture this:
What do I do when I have moments like this? I lose myself watching our cats ...
You never know what you may capture when you videotape animals and children. This was simply a moment when I noticed 'Ray' (our New Cat) chasing his tail. It is nothing. But it is everything.
Cats have a way of quietly amusing themselves. Whether it is watching invisible dust particles in the air ... or gazing out the window ... or simply curled up in a tight little ball and making 'sleep' look like a sport ... I simply love to watch our cat(s).
Yesterday morning there was a moment of flying black fur that happened too fast to record. Ray was racing around the living room. Andre (our Old Cat) was doing his best impression of playing. For the most part, he stays in one place while Ray races past him.
Picture this:
- A young, black furball races around the living room
- An older, more laid back version of the same ball of fur lays in wait
- The young one races over the back of the loveseat and takes a flying leap off of it, towards the runway (hall) ahead
- The older one watches the action and then takes a flying leap into the air to try and tag the cat flying overhead
- Then they were off ...
Monday, June 3, 2013
Ready to Roll Again
This weekend was full of absolutely everything I needed. It felt absolutely wonderful to follow my whims and go with the natural flow of the days. And it felt even better to feel motivated once again!
I lost my motivation several years ago. It didn't happen overnight, but the stresses of my (attempted) career change took their toll on me. I had nothing left at the end of a day. Perhaps I was wrong not to power through the change and force myself to place my leftover time towards the house and yard. Everything overwhelmed and exasperated me in those days. So I gave myself permission to do nothing whenever the opportunity arose.
I could hear my old voice talking to other people in another time about how good it feels to accomplish those tedious tasks around the house and yard. "Yes, it is hard to get started. But once you start, momentum carries you through the task-at-hand and beyond!" Nope. Not lately it hasn't. In fact, completing one small task was onerous. It just opened my eyes to everything else that needed to be done. I was overwhelmed at the mere thought of all the work that has been neglected (for far too long) around here.
I have been focusing on the yard lately. It is a very good place to start because it involves being outside, breathing in fresh air, enjoying the beautiful weather and sunny skies. As big as the great outdoors feels, this is the place where I feel I need to start. I need to become one with the world outside of these doors before I can focus inwards.
Six years ago, I healed a broken heart by doing everything that I could possibly do outside. It was the best therapy in the world for me. Simply sitting on the doorstep puts my small worries into perspective. Working outside and accomplishing something tangible releases happy endorphins within me. I know this is what helped to heal me back then.
'Taking back the back yard' this spring and containing the dogs into a confined space has finally given me back what I have been missing. The yard. The ability to putter away at something that won't be messed up, dug up or destroyed by the dogs. My daycare gave me permission to 'take back the yard' and in doing so ... I have found a piece of myself that had been lost. I am starting to care again. And it feels wonderful!
My Son, His Girlfriend and their dogs will be moving out to their farm before the year's end. They have been living here for about the same amount of time that my ambition has waned. My son was a godsend in all that he tended since he moved back home. But now, his energy is being spent on making his own home. This has forced me back to the place that I once was. An independent soul, taking care of herself (for the most part) and not relying on anyone else to 'do the hard stuff'.
Doing the hard stuff is rewarding. Yes, it is tedious, repetitive, frustrating, overwhelming and exasperating at times. But taking ownership for that-which-has-gone-awry and powering through it with all that you have to give is energizing.
I curled up into a little ball and let the world 'happen' all around me these past (too) many years. I'm coming out of my cocoon again. I am flexing my wings. And it feels good.
I'm ready to roll once again!
I lost my motivation several years ago. It didn't happen overnight, but the stresses of my (attempted) career change took their toll on me. I had nothing left at the end of a day. Perhaps I was wrong not to power through the change and force myself to place my leftover time towards the house and yard. Everything overwhelmed and exasperated me in those days. So I gave myself permission to do nothing whenever the opportunity arose.
I could hear my old voice talking to other people in another time about how good it feels to accomplish those tedious tasks around the house and yard. "Yes, it is hard to get started. But once you start, momentum carries you through the task-at-hand and beyond!" Nope. Not lately it hasn't. In fact, completing one small task was onerous. It just opened my eyes to everything else that needed to be done. I was overwhelmed at the mere thought of all the work that has been neglected (for far too long) around here.
I have been focusing on the yard lately. It is a very good place to start because it involves being outside, breathing in fresh air, enjoying the beautiful weather and sunny skies. As big as the great outdoors feels, this is the place where I feel I need to start. I need to become one with the world outside of these doors before I can focus inwards.
Six years ago, I healed a broken heart by doing everything that I could possibly do outside. It was the best therapy in the world for me. Simply sitting on the doorstep puts my small worries into perspective. Working outside and accomplishing something tangible releases happy endorphins within me. I know this is what helped to heal me back then.
'Taking back the back yard' this spring and containing the dogs into a confined space has finally given me back what I have been missing. The yard. The ability to putter away at something that won't be messed up, dug up or destroyed by the dogs. My daycare gave me permission to 'take back the yard' and in doing so ... I have found a piece of myself that had been lost. I am starting to care again. And it feels wonderful!
My Son, His Girlfriend and their dogs will be moving out to their farm before the year's end. They have been living here for about the same amount of time that my ambition has waned. My son was a godsend in all that he tended since he moved back home. But now, his energy is being spent on making his own home. This has forced me back to the place that I once was. An independent soul, taking care of herself (for the most part) and not relying on anyone else to 'do the hard stuff'.
Doing the hard stuff is rewarding. Yes, it is tedious, repetitive, frustrating, overwhelming and exasperating at times. But taking ownership for that-which-has-gone-awry and powering through it with all that you have to give is energizing.
I curled up into a little ball and let the world 'happen' all around me these past (too) many years. I'm coming out of my cocoon again. I am flexing my wings. And it feels good.
I'm ready to roll once again!
Sunday, June 2, 2013
A Cancelled Day!
I love spur of the moment days! A day without any preconceived idea of where it may go is my most favorite kind of day in the world!
I woke up feeling rotten. I was going to call in sick. I didn't want to spread what I thought that I may have to my boss (who has been under a great deal of stress and I would imagine that she could be very vulnerable to catching a bug) ...
I really, really didn't want to go to work. Feeling rotten was just an excuse. I just wanted to stay home.
Then, miraculously I felt better an hour later. The mere idea of going in to work on a Sunday didn't tip the balance of the day. I could do this thing. I really could.
I gave myself one more hour of indulging my 'Gilmore Girls' addiction. I would call at 9:00 and confirm that today was a 'go'. I was ready to work.
I called and my boss had pneumonia. She sounded pretty awful and she didn't feel up to working today. She asked if I would mind cancelling today and coming next Sunday instead. Mind?!? I was in heaven!
I celebrated by making myself a third cup of coffee. I was still drinking it when a friend dropped by and I could actually invite them in for a visit. I wasn't running out the door! I could stop and visit with someone I hadn't talked to in ages. I love spontaneous decisions such as those.
Eventually my Second Son got up and joined in on the conversation. Our visit lasted much longer than any one of us may have anticipated. And it could! Because the day was footloose and fancy free!
After my company left, I continued to savor my last cup of coffee and chatted with My Son. Eventually he noticed our neighbor cutting down the weeds behind our fence in the alley. This same neighbor had sprayed my weeds earlier in the week but I was busy with the kids and didn't have the chance to talk with him. So I ran out to apologize for the weeds running out of control and to thank him for taking care of our mess back there (and promised to keep it up myself from here on).
We chatted for quite some time and by the time I made it back into the house, My Son and His Girlfriend had made breakfast. All four of us sat together at the kitchen table and savored our meal. We used to do this on a semi-sorta-regular basis. I can't remember the last time we sat down and ate a Sunday brunch together (that wasn't Christmas or because my mom was here). It was ... fantastic. It was ever so much more special because it is simply something we rarely do these days.
Eventually we all went our separate ways and carried on with our Sunday.
I was sufficiently nourished, caffeinated and motivated. I got myself busy and I simply didn't stop. All day. I took care of a few nasty little jobs that I have wanted to do for ages. Today was the perfect day to tackle the impossible. It was a day I wasn't counting on. It was a bonus day. At last, I could get some bonus work done!
Since I was already dusty and dirty, it was a most excellent day to mow the lawn. It feels wonderful to shower at the end of a day that is filled with productivity, a little sweat and grime.
It felt so very, very good to cross a few dirty jobs off of my to-do-list. If I had gone to work as planned today, none of the above would have happened. None of it. Well ... I would have showered. But that shower would have felt like a job. Not like a reward!
I simply could not have planned a better day. I am very grateful for today's last minute cancellation. It brought a sense of spontaneity into the day that will sustain and energize me throughout the week ahead.
I woke up feeling rotten. I was going to call in sick. I didn't want to spread what I thought that I may have to my boss (who has been under a great deal of stress and I would imagine that she could be very vulnerable to catching a bug) ...
I really, really didn't want to go to work. Feeling rotten was just an excuse. I just wanted to stay home.
Then, miraculously I felt better an hour later. The mere idea of going in to work on a Sunday didn't tip the balance of the day. I could do this thing. I really could.
I gave myself one more hour of indulging my 'Gilmore Girls' addiction. I would call at 9:00 and confirm that today was a 'go'. I was ready to work.
I called and my boss had pneumonia. She sounded pretty awful and she didn't feel up to working today. She asked if I would mind cancelling today and coming next Sunday instead. Mind?!? I was in heaven!
I celebrated by making myself a third cup of coffee. I was still drinking it when a friend dropped by and I could actually invite them in for a visit. I wasn't running out the door! I could stop and visit with someone I hadn't talked to in ages. I love spontaneous decisions such as those.
Eventually my Second Son got up and joined in on the conversation. Our visit lasted much longer than any one of us may have anticipated. And it could! Because the day was footloose and fancy free!
After my company left, I continued to savor my last cup of coffee and chatted with My Son. Eventually he noticed our neighbor cutting down the weeds behind our fence in the alley. This same neighbor had sprayed my weeds earlier in the week but I was busy with the kids and didn't have the chance to talk with him. So I ran out to apologize for the weeds running out of control and to thank him for taking care of our mess back there (and promised to keep it up myself from here on).
We chatted for quite some time and by the time I made it back into the house, My Son and His Girlfriend had made breakfast. All four of us sat together at the kitchen table and savored our meal. We used to do this on a semi-sorta-regular basis. I can't remember the last time we sat down and ate a Sunday brunch together (that wasn't Christmas or because my mom was here). It was ... fantastic. It was ever so much more special because it is simply something we rarely do these days.
Eventually we all went our separate ways and carried on with our Sunday.
I was sufficiently nourished, caffeinated and motivated. I got myself busy and I simply didn't stop. All day. I took care of a few nasty little jobs that I have wanted to do for ages. Today was the perfect day to tackle the impossible. It was a day I wasn't counting on. It was a bonus day. At last, I could get some bonus work done!
Since I was already dusty and dirty, it was a most excellent day to mow the lawn. It feels wonderful to shower at the end of a day that is filled with productivity, a little sweat and grime.
It felt so very, very good to cross a few dirty jobs off of my to-do-list. If I had gone to work as planned today, none of the above would have happened. None of it. Well ... I would have showered. But that shower would have felt like a job. Not like a reward!
I simply could not have planned a better day. I am very grateful for today's last minute cancellation. It brought a sense of spontaneity into the day that will sustain and energize me throughout the week ahead.
Saturday, June 1, 2013
Succession to the Throne ~ A Cat Story
It has been interesting to sit back and watch our New Cat find his way and place in our lives and within the perameters our Old Cat has subtly set for his young friend.
Andre (our existing cat) is one cool cat. I have said time and time again that I believe that he was raised by dogs. His social skills and ability to adapt and love with abandon are more dog-like than 'catty' in any way.
When Radius (we have abbreviated our new cat's pre-existing name to 'Ray') came into our home, Andre gave Ray a few warning hisses. They sniffed noses, each was curious about the other and they traded acknowledgements. And that was (just about) that.
The first few days, it seemed that Andre could not rest. He watched over Ray's every move. It reminded me of the way I watch over my daycare family. When everyone was new, I monitered their every move until we all knew each other and everyone knew the rules and guidelines. I could almost hear Andre's cat-body-language mimic my own until Ray settled in a little bit.
Ray comes from a family of twenty cats. He is a social animal. He isn't vying for authority over Andre in any capacity. But Ray comes with a quiet, self-assured way that makes it very clear that he will not be going hungry or bending to authority. He is a cat that simply knows what he wants. And he goes for it.
Andre was always low-cat-on-the-totem pole when we had three cats. He has been thriving in his one-and-only-cat status for at least seven years now. We have grown to love the confidence that he exudes when he is not bending to the authority of another cat. He loves his people and his purr can be heard from across the room when he wants everyone to know how loved they are. He is one extra special guy.
When I saw his confidence wane in the first few days Ray came into our lives, I gave him many a pep-talk. "You are still King Cat around here. You keep Ray in line. You were here first!" I like to think that we understand Andre and he understands us. In the case of Andre's English comprehension not being as capable as I hoped it to be, we tried to communicate our thoughts in nonverbal ways too.
We ensured Andre knew that his special soft cat food meals were his. Ray has no sense of boundaries. When he smelled food, he just went for it. Andre would have gladly stepped aside. But we didn't allow it. Andre gets first dibs!
Andre has a special spot on the couch in My Youngest's room. Andre chose to abandon it for a few days but My Youngest continued to ensure that Andre knew that was his spot. Not Ray's. Ray's spot is on the other side of the couch. One cat to My Youngest's right. Another cat to his left. One hand to pet each cat. It makes me smile when I check up on the cats in the middle of the day (when my son is in school). I have often found each of them in their own special spot on the couch.
Whenever it is appropriate, we continue to remind Andre that his ranking within our family has not changed. Though I believe he questioned it at first, I think that he is learning to believe it.
Cat games between Andre & Ray involve a (pretty tame) game of tag. Andre is always in pursuit. We think that this is Andre's way of reminding Ray who is in charge here.
Then there is wrestling. Again, it is a pretty mild form of cat-wrestling ... but what we are seeing, is that Ray is the submissive one. He lays on his back and Andre is the more dominant of the two. Ray is a bigger, younger and more agile cat by far. He could easily rule the wrestling matches. But he doesn't. I give him a lot of credit for that. He is a pretty cool cat too.
Ray is now giving Andre a little space when Andre is dining on his special soft cat food meal. Not much space. And I hesitate to believe that Ray has the will power to step back from the food without human intervention. But he is quietly adapting to the rules-of-the-house.
Ray is a quiet little rebel. As Andre has wielded his authority, taught him right from wrong in the cat-rules around the house, been the persuer in tag and is the reigning champ in wrestling. But Ray is curious and agile young guy. He sets his sights on that which is above him ...
Yes Andre, you are still King Cat around here. But Ray is watching your every move. He may only be Prince (Charming) right now. But I think he getting used to the idea of being first in line to your throne.
Andre (our existing cat) is one cool cat. I have said time and time again that I believe that he was raised by dogs. His social skills and ability to adapt and love with abandon are more dog-like than 'catty' in any way.
When Radius (we have abbreviated our new cat's pre-existing name to 'Ray') came into our home, Andre gave Ray a few warning hisses. They sniffed noses, each was curious about the other and they traded acknowledgements. And that was (just about) that.
The first few days, it seemed that Andre could not rest. He watched over Ray's every move. It reminded me of the way I watch over my daycare family. When everyone was new, I monitered their every move until we all knew each other and everyone knew the rules and guidelines. I could almost hear Andre's cat-body-language mimic my own until Ray settled in a little bit.
Ray comes from a family of twenty cats. He is a social animal. He isn't vying for authority over Andre in any capacity. But Ray comes with a quiet, self-assured way that makes it very clear that he will not be going hungry or bending to authority. He is a cat that simply knows what he wants. And he goes for it.
Andre was always low-cat-on-the-totem pole when we had three cats. He has been thriving in his one-and-only-cat status for at least seven years now. We have grown to love the confidence that he exudes when he is not bending to the authority of another cat. He loves his people and his purr can be heard from across the room when he wants everyone to know how loved they are. He is one extra special guy.
When I saw his confidence wane in the first few days Ray came into our lives, I gave him many a pep-talk. "You are still King Cat around here. You keep Ray in line. You were here first!" I like to think that we understand Andre and he understands us. In the case of Andre's English comprehension not being as capable as I hoped it to be, we tried to communicate our thoughts in nonverbal ways too.
We ensured Andre knew that his special soft cat food meals were his. Ray has no sense of boundaries. When he smelled food, he just went for it. Andre would have gladly stepped aside. But we didn't allow it. Andre gets first dibs!
Andre has a special spot on the couch in My Youngest's room. Andre chose to abandon it for a few days but My Youngest continued to ensure that Andre knew that was his spot. Not Ray's. Ray's spot is on the other side of the couch. One cat to My Youngest's right. Another cat to his left. One hand to pet each cat. It makes me smile when I check up on the cats in the middle of the day (when my son is in school). I have often found each of them in their own special spot on the couch.
Whenever it is appropriate, we continue to remind Andre that his ranking within our family has not changed. Though I believe he questioned it at first, I think that he is learning to believe it.
Cat games between Andre & Ray involve a (pretty tame) game of tag. Andre is always in pursuit. We think that this is Andre's way of reminding Ray who is in charge here.
Then there is wrestling. Again, it is a pretty mild form of cat-wrestling ... but what we are seeing, is that Ray is the submissive one. He lays on his back and Andre is the more dominant of the two. Ray is a bigger, younger and more agile cat by far. He could easily rule the wrestling matches. But he doesn't. I give him a lot of credit for that. He is a pretty cool cat too.
Ray is now giving Andre a little space when Andre is dining on his special soft cat food meal. Not much space. And I hesitate to believe that Ray has the will power to step back from the food without human intervention. But he is quietly adapting to the rules-of-the-house.
Ray is a quiet little rebel. As Andre has wielded his authority, taught him right from wrong in the cat-rules around the house, been the persuer in tag and is the reigning champ in wrestling. But Ray is curious and agile young guy. He sets his sights on that which is above him ...
Yes Andre, you are still King Cat around here. But Ray is watching your every move. He may only be Prince (Charming) right now. But I think he getting used to the idea of being first in line to your throne.
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