Valuing What We Already Have

This morning, I had a fleeting memory of a friend from long ago. She was a single mom. She wanted the best for her child. We worked together in a financial institution. She was fired when it was discovered she forged a withdrawal from an inactive bank account. We never spoke of this indiscretion but remained friends afterward.

The last time I visited with her, she was married and living "the good life" in a beautiful new house with no financial worries. It would appear she had it all. Except I walked away from our visit sensing something amiss. Her eyes weren't happy. There was something missing that money couldn't buy.

I'll never know what became of her. We lost touch and went on to live our own lives.

I have no idea why that memory surfaced this morning. The feeling I had when I walked away from that visit where everything looked perfect on the outside. I remember thinking "money can't buy happiness" and the look in those eyes are a reminder to this day.

If I have one trait I am willing to commend myself on, I would say it is the lack of envy. I don't want what others have. I don't look at material wealth, belongings, relationships, careers, vacations, physical attributes and feel jealous. I appreciate what others have but know if I want things differently for myself, I must do the work to get there.

Living a comfortable life, where I have the ability to pay the bills to keep a roof over our head, food and fuel to sustain us and an income that provides for day-to-day living is a blessing. 

It goes without saying that harmony within that very home, healthy relationships and physical/mental health and mobility top my list gratitude list.

But I am my mother's daughter. Once those creature comforts are met and sustained, my home and how I feel in it and about it tops my priority list, as far as material desires and wishes. 

Our home renovations a few years ago were a time of great joy. Spiffing up what we had with new flooring, doors, light fixtures, window coverings and new paint felt like more of a revival than a renovation. We carried that maintenance outside and our home felt loved again.

I didn't buy new furniture, pictures or accessories of any kind (well, I did buy a new soap dispenser, a red hand towel and oven mitts for the kitchen). I didn't need to go hog wild. I just wanted to maintain what we had and everything else was good enough. At least until the cats die. Then it is my mission to buy new living room furniture.

I feel very much the same way when it comes to this new little home-away-from-home I've adopted. I gaze across the street and see lovely newer homes with well maintained yards. I don't want what they have. I want what we already own to reflect a certain pride of ownership. Just spiff things up, clean and maintain what we have then just dream of future plans that reflect what we hope for. 

I don't envy those who have what I don't have. But I can't wait to wander aimlessly through the streets to see what others have done with their yards and see what ideas we can borrow from others. 

But there is something I must confess. I do have a pretty strong case of "laundry room envy". I look at other people's clean, functional laundry rooms with cool features like flooring, actual finished ceilings and a clean organized space to hang and fold laundry ... and I am envious.

I know I have nothing to complain about. Our laundry room has come a long way. The washer and dryer actually sit beside each other now (instead of across the room). We have a wall of shelving to die for. There is room within the laundry room to house our furnace, water heater, a spare fridge and all of our cat's needs. All it really needs is flooring, a ceiling and a clean folding space to complete my wish list.

But my home-away-from-home? I am grateful it came with a functioning washer and dryer. We would be lost without that. But beyond that? It's got a long way to go.

As Mike Holmes would say, we must start with the foundation. It's pretty scary in that basement. Creepy may be an apt description. With that new foundation will come the potential for the laundry room I've always wished for. Maybe. I'll still settle for a fully functional washer and dryer. For without those, a beautiful laundry room has no function.

Seeing the value in what we already have is key to feeling "rich". I have everything money can't buy. And I am grateful.