One Bored Kitty = Trouble (Updated)

Our not so little cat "Jet" is bored out of his mind. He really, really wants to go outside to watch the birds, follow his curiosity and go wherever he wants to go. But he can't. So he is following his curiosity and going wherever he wants to go inside instead.

Our not so little black cat has not only learned how to open closet doors and shed his lovely black coat of hair within, but he has discovered how to open the kitchen cupboards as well.

Most of our cupboards have child locks on them but the corner cupboard doesn't have a lock. How Jet discovered the "one out of five", I'll never know. He must check out his options at night. But he has figured out how to play in the cupboards. Joy.

When he disappeared entirely, I opened the cupboard door and couldn't even see him because he had tucked himself into the back corner of the cupboard, on the Lazy Susan (I was just able to get this blurry shot of him as he made his dash for freedom).

I bought him a bag full of cat toys while I was away this past weekend. Nothing for my youngest or for me. Just a bag of interesting looking cat toys (mostly) for this bored little cat of ours. 

He comes outside when I take the kids out and sticks around the yard pretty good. He does have to be coaxed to stick within our property line but he hasn't been making a mad dash for it when we (I) try to catch him. But the season is young. This guy has such an adventuresome spirit that I can't imagine him being content within such a small space for long.

Thankfully he is scared of people, bikes, skateboards and anything that makes a noise he isn't familiar with. When he hears any of the above, he makes a bee line for the back door and his heart is pounding like he's running for his life.

Oh, how I would love to get some new cupboards. Can you imagine the conversation that would take place as I placed my order? "They have to be cat and kid proof, and able to withstand a cat trying to open them."

We should be getting our new back doors within the next few weeks. A new inside door and a storm door, both doors will have lever handles (the type of handle our bored little cat has mastered on the front door). I have a feeling our cat will soon be letting himself out to play. We'll have to be sure we have a cat-proof door lock.

More adventures to follow ...

Six hours later:

We took our bored little cat out into the back yard with us this morning. I know he has his eye on that which is outside of our back yard but he found the next best thing. He climbed the playground structure and managed to find his way onto the "roof" so he could do some bird watching.

Can you find a cat peeking out of the trees?

Then he did a little spying on the neighbors too. 

I left him up in the "tree house" while I brought the kids inside, hoping he wouldn't make a dash for it and climb the tree or jump out of the back yard. You'll never guess where he was when I went to check on him ten minutes later. Standing at the back door with a worried look that said, "You forgot me!" Maybe he isn't so adventureous after all.

Living a Distracted Life

I returned from a three day weekend at my mom's to a phone and computer full of messages to return. I had one phone message, two text messages, one email, one Facebook message and had to initiate two other "conversations".

For the sake of simplicity, I decided to send off one message to two sisters. That seemed the most time effective, least intrusive and expedient way to pass along the message Mom wanted me to tell them. Mom would be aghast that I did not pick up the phone and call. Please don't tell her.

This set off a flurry of follow up texts as I "conversed" with each of my sisters at the same time. At the same time this was going on, I also texted one of my daycare parents telling her it would be fine if she brought her son to daycare the next day. We also conversed via text a few times before we put an end to that conversation.

I had one text, inviting me to phone the next afternoon at 5:30. Before I knew if I was free at 5:30, I actually had to pick up the phone and talk with my bookkeeping boss to confirm our plans to work the next day. When it was decided that "yes" we were working, I told her I was going to make a call first and I would be slightly delayed. Whew! Two decisions made with one conversation. I had one more text to send though.

Then came an invitation to go see a movie I wanted to see. The movie listings only went up to Thursday so could I "commit" to seeing a movie after having to work one night this week? Tough decision. Finally I found the words to say "yes" to the movie, but maybe we could see if a Sunday matinee would be a viable option when they listed the upcoming weekend's schedule.

I barely made that monumental decision (all of these "yes" or "no" and commitments and conversations falling upon my shoulders the minute I got home felt harder than they needed to feel) when another friend contacted me about attending an upcoming concert to see one of our favorite singer/songwriters. "Tickets go on sale on Friday!", but the event doesn't take place for two more months so that was a much easier "yes".

I walked in the door at approximately 5:30. I sent off my first text at 5:39 p.m. and made my last outbound contact at 8:49 p.m. Three hours of "conversations" with seven different people with need to make five decisions tapped out the last of my resources and I was more than ready to call it a day at the end of it all.

I find it so hard to say "Yes!" to life these days. It is even harder at the end of three days away from home. But I did it. I said "Yes!" to all five invitations, requests and suggestions. And it was good.

How did we do this back in the day when we relied solely on a telephone to communicate? I had four text message conversations going on simultaneously, with half written responses to two other people going on in my head at the same time. The only person who got my undivided attention was the person I talked with on the phone. Is it any wonder that my mom is exasperated with those who can't sit still and focus on ONE conversation, with ONE person without a blasted cell phone in their pocket that is driving them to distraction?

My mind was all over the map and I couldn't wait to shut down and turn off all means of communication. I'm grateful it was so easy to reach out to so many, make many decisions and have conversations that needed to be had. But now that I sit still with all of that "noise" of those three hours of my life, I feel badly for butting into line in too many people's lives.

Emails seem "polite". People read and respond to them when they have time. They are a little bit like an unopened letter sitting on the kitchen table waiting patiently for the recipient to have time to sit still and enjoy the visit when it works for them.

I used to think a telephone was rude and intrusive. You drop everything when the phone rings. Not so much these days. With call display and answering machines, it is becoming easier to "take a message and get back to you later".

But cell phones and texting? I know I should give them the same priority as an email but I can't. A text message invites an immediate response. Unless I'm driving, I usually heed that call. I am as disgusted in myself as my mom would be if she knew the extent that blasted little phone runs my life.

It is good to be "connected". But at what cost? I barely spoke to my son and acknowledged our cats when I got home from a three day absence. Granted, my son made the first move and headed downstairs with his supper. I assume he was in the middle of an "important" on-line game, which has become a priority far too much of the time. But who am I to judge? Look at the example I am setting.

I'm grateful I am not shying away from technology but it has crossed a line. It has become all too consuming within my life. I am the only one who can make the decision to turn off or ignore those little beeps and twirps and whatever other noises that phone makes to distract me from the moment I'm living in.

I would go and turn off that little attention grabber right now, if it wasn't the preferred method of communication within all of my daycare families. I'm glad our land line phone isn't ringing off the hook but that has come at a cost. The question is what is the price of an undistracted conversation these days? It has become a precious commodity.

Feeling Watered Down

I read this quote from a guy who lives in the 16' box truck and writes a blog about it. I am mesmerized by the concept of "living small' and I think this quote sums up why I crave to simplify my life:

"I don't enjoy being busy. I enjoy creating fulfilling work to do, but having too many things going on in my life only dilutes how much of myself I'm able to put into each one." ~ Thoughts From Inside the Box

His words nailed it on the head for me. I do not enjoy the state of busyness. A sense of purpose? Definitely. The feeling of accomplishment? Yes. Enough to do to appreciate the luxury of doing nothing? Absolutely. Being busy? No.

"Creating fulfilling work." Yes. Yes! And YES! As daunting and overwhelmed as I feel when I'm in over my head doing something that matters, it fuels me when I'm doing something that creates a sense of purpose and belonging. It is a little bit like being in the middle of a good novel. You open a book not knowing if you are up to following through and reading until the end. Then you get to the middle and you can't wait to turn the next page. You are on the edge of your seat (or couch or whatever). Then it ends. Yes, I would like to live a life that feels like I'm "living in the middle of a chapter", doing something that matters to me.

"Having too many things going on in my life only dilutes how much of myself I'm able to put into each one." Oh. My. Gosh. YES!! I don't feel like I'm doing anything "right" or "enough" or with passion these days. I just sleep-walked (slept-walked??) through the last week trying to knock too many things off of my eternal to-do list. I got to the end of a day and wondered if I had absorbed any one minute and revelled in it. It was a terrible way to live a week. Yes, I accomplished most of what I had set out to do. But I was miserable while stuck in the mire of that particular chapter of my life. Blech! Last week is not the week I want to be remembered by.

I have done more "impossible things" around the house this morning than I feel like I've done in a month. But I have done so with a purpose and a goal. My second son is headed over and I have about an hour and a half left to do what I want to do. Then I'm going to walk away from all responsibility and live my weekend in the moment. I hope.

That is my goal. To clear the clutter of my life off  my plate this morning and be where I want and need to be this weekend.

Signing off for now. I'll see what words find me as I get quiet and centered. I'll be back!

When Watering a Plant Becomes Too Much

You know you are over extended when even your plants seem too needy. I looked at those two thirsty pots of need and walked away to water them another day. Another day never came.

There just doesn't seem to be enough of "me" to go around lately. When ten to eleven hours of the weekday are spent watching over one to three year olds, there is rarely a chance to sit still in the sun and soak in the day. Somebody always needs something. If they don't, I need to be utilizing those moments where I find them in order to provide food, order and structure within our day. My Fitbit tells me that I put on about 10,000 (usually more) steps per daycare day. This explains why I wear out socks so fast but it also justifies why nothing else seems to get done during my week. Those little people eat up a lot of my energy.

I feel better when I push myself out and mingle with adults throughout the week but doing so takes away from the time I need for "me" and sleep. It is a slippery slope. I don't even want to talk at the end of my day, let alone leave the house. Friendship is so vital to nurturing one's soul. But it is an investment that also takes time and energy from a day that has already gone on for soooo long.

Then there is my Saturday employment. I see no way out, so I focus on what it brings into my week. I use a different part of my brain, I'm helping a friend, I do get paid for my efforts and I finally found a way to work "getting groceries" into a week that is never long enough. I stop for groceries on my way home, pick up sub sandwiches for supper, come home, put everything away then I reward myself with my sub. "All the hard stuff is done! Now I can relax..."

Except, if I want to get anything done at all around the house I cannot afford to fritter away too many Sundays. I take what I need, when I need them but when I spend an entire Sunday working at that which must be done, I am completely depleted when I wake up to a new week the next morning.

The to-do list never ends. In fact it rarely even starts because it is too disheartening to write down what needs to be done when you don't ever get the satisfaction of stroking everything (or anything) off of the list. So I now make "piles". The reading pile, the dream notebook, that which I need to do or file away pile, the income tax pile, the writing pile ...

And then there are (were) the plants. "You want something from me too?? Well get to the back of the line, buster! You can just sit there and wait."

People say plants usually suffer from too much watering. Not in this house, they don't. I used to water the plants on Fridays. Then I would forget on Friday and do it when I remembered the following Monday or Wednesday. Then when the new watering day should have been Wednesday, it got pushed back until Friday again. Then Monday or Wednesday and so on and so forth.

Finally, my plants went two weeks without water. They even had the nerve to thrive throughout their drought. And I neglected to water them when the second Friday rolled around. Or the Monday or Wednesday following that. By the time Thursday rolled around I thought "I don't want these plants and they won't die!" So I put them up for adoption.

Thankfully my second son was willing to take on these plants which had a history. My sister-in-law (his aunt) gave them to us twenty three years ago. They have never been repotted, fertilized or nurtured in any way other than their weekly shot of water. Yet they survived and thrived this neglect.

When my son said he would take them off my hands, I felt the same relief when our poor, neglected dog found a home where he would be wanted, loved and get the attention he deserved. Finally! A good home for our plants.

What is going on when watering two plants once every week or so becomes too much?? I am now wondering what else is dispensable around here. My youngest son better watch out! (just kidding)

Snow, Snow Go Away

We have had a lovely blast of "winter" the past few weeks. It was not unexpected, but it was hard to go from this:

to this:

But yesterday, it was warm enough to make this:

So maybe I won't complain. Because it could be so much worse. 

When life hands you snow, be grateful for the days when you can make a snowman.

Purging my Morning Thoughts (a blog post about nothing)

I start each day with the best of intentions. I have set my alarm for 5:00 a.m., which almost guarantees I'm out of bed by 5:30 but I have had several 5:00 a.m. mornings lately. The gift of that extra half hour is a wonderful way to start my day.

That bonus half hour gets swallowed up into the day so fast I don't know where it went. But it's gone. That half hour is supposed to buy me the time to do all I need to do for "me" before my daycare day begins. Every morning I do my best to have life neatly tucked away before the door opens. Then the door opens early. Or it snows. Or I'm folding that load of laundry I had time to do. Or I'm finalizing a blog post and racing to the finish line. The more time I have, the more I think I can do and I still feel like I'm running behind.

So I (eventually) grab my cup of coffee and settle in on the couch and think I will do nothing but absorb the wonders and stories and conversations of my little daycare crew. It works for all but a minute.

The minute I sit down, one of several things happens: a nose needs to be wiped; someone needs something from me; I see something I should be doing; we should go outside; the whole crew sits down beside me; a parent will text me; someone needs to go to the bathroom or be changed; it is time to start preparing for a meal; or I will distract myself and realize there is "one more thing" I should do before I forget. My "sitting on the couch and inhaling the day" moments last as long as a soap bubble before it bursts all over my face.

Yesterday it was my income taxes. They are haunting me in a big way this year. I thought the way to take that worry off my plate was to give it to someone else. "Give" is probably not the correct word to use because I don't think they will consider this a gift, thus some money must change hands. But it will be worth every penny for my peace of mind.

So I made one quick call and my wish was granted. "Just bring your prior two years income taxes with you, along with a print out of your expenses." Easy enough. I had just worked through those papers a few days ago and all the numbers and revisions were done. All I had to do was print them off. Except I had made one little mistake, so in my haste to correct my error and print off my work I made a few more mistakes. Then I wanted to ensure my paperwork was neat and easy to follow, so I revised and printed and revised and reprinted and revised and reprinted some more.

While I was in the mood for calling professionals to do do my dirty work, I thought I should make an appointment to redo my will. That did not go according to plan. I thought an appointment with a will and estate planner at my financial institution would do the trick. But no, it wouldn't be that simple. Nor do the hours coincide with mine. I will have to find another way, another time.

I started writing up my daycare newsletter during our quiet time. I had completed the first draft of what I was going to consider good enough and then I received a text from one of my parents, which changed some of my "Comings and Goings at Daycare" news. Which is good and bad. Good, because I was feeling a little bit stressed over taking on this child temporarily. And there was really no "bad" side to it. I had tentatively written this income into my budget but I don't think I even gave it a dollar value. I bought new back doors based on another child who didn't end up coming and "this" was supposed to replace "that" income. But it all works out in the wash. So no, there is really no bad side to this. I am somewhat relieved. Except I have to rewrite part of my newsletter now.

I have columns to submit and I'm running out of time. Just as I have run out of time once again this morning. Here is to hoping today has enough quiet moments within it to do my job the way it is supposed to be done. "In the moment." One sure has to plan for those "in the moment" moments, don't they?

What a Difference a Day Can Make!

Take one part inspiration and learning ("Thanks Brené Brown!"), combined with five parts income tax and numbers (I don't mind numbers once I sit down and start playing with them, I simply prefer "letters" these days), add a little nourishment for good measure (finally all the week's leftovers are gone!), take a drive with your son (it is kind of fun being in the passenger seat for a change!), add one more part of the income tax/number combo, then top it all off with a little "Brené Brown" finale (her Ted Talk on shame is hilarious and thought provoking, but watch her Ted Talk on vulnerability first. It sets the stage for what is to follow) and you have my "yesterday".

I was determined not to waste the day, so I got up at 6:00 a.m. and refused to allow myself to turn on the TV. The second thing I would not allow myself to do, was to get lost on the Internet. I could dabble with intent, but I could not get lost. That proved to be a winning combination.

I had so many time consuming items on my to-do list and I knew I needed to fill up my positivity and inspirational well. So I started with the "Living Brave" class I am taking (lead by my current new hero "Brené Brown"). I was completely overwhelmed with the fist lesson of the second half of the class. There were three chapters to read and thirty five questions to be answered, It took me forever. But I finally completed that task, posted my answer to the last question of that assignment as a blog post here, watched her Ted Talk on vulnerability and moved on.

Then came the numbers. I had so many number puzzles to solve and unravel. I went to an accountant to learn all I could learn about what I could and could not deduct and how to calculate my "Business Use of Home" percentage. This knowledge was frightening because I had not used this formula nor some of the proper deductions in the two years which have preceded this one. So of course, I wanted to go back two years and recalculate my daycare deductions to see how much of a mess I was in. Thus, the procrastination.

Long story short, I under-claimed my expenses the first year and over-claimed them the second. I under-claimed more than I over-claimed and I didn't claim all of my expenses in the year preceding the year I claimed too much. I have all of my receipts and spreadsheets and was able to reconstruct the years and work on the current year within the space of an afternoon. So I have all the information ready and waiting if it is ever questioned. This was a huge relief for me. Huge.

There is no way I could have squeezed that project into the cracks of my week. When it comes to numbers, I like to sit down without distraction or interruption and work through the puzzle from beginning to end. I had one small mystery to do with my current year's income tax but came back to that after a leisurely Sunday drive with my son and the answer was staring me in the face. Sometimes one does have to walk away and come back later.

After that, I did the "hard part" of Mom's taxes, checked and re-checked my numbers and was satisfied that I had done all I could do. Then I sat down with my good friend Brené and shared some perspective, some good laughs and words that left me thinking.

When all was said and done, I accomplished a lot. There is much left to do but a weekend of "doing" has energized me ten times more than a weekend of "doing nothing". I filled myself up with what I needed. I nourished myself with (relatively) healthy food, positive thoughts and ideas, I unravelled a few mysteries and I put the work I dread the most in the "done" pile. All I can say is "Whew!"

Now, I just have to check out this new concept I just heard last week. The whole idea of "Spring Cleaning" has been rather elusive to me the past very long while. I took on the task of decluttering and wiped and swiped my way through that. But what if I stopped worrying about the clutter and just cleaned away the dirt? Now that is an idea I think I can sink my teeth into.

If only I had another Sunday. I've said it before and I'll say it again. One day is simply not enough.