Taking a Math Break

There is a reason I never became an accountant or a full time "numbers" person. I am taking a break from math this morning. Maybe the whole day. I've had my fill for the moment.

I know why I am drawn to numbers. You are figuring out solvable problems. There are answers that are deemed right or wrong. I love balancing to zero. It is one of my favorite things.

But what I am discovering is that there are so many ways go come to the correct answer.

Appeasing all the rules of accounting, the taxation department, ensuring everything is reported correctly, consistently and adheres to all the cross checks and balances boggles my mind every now and again.

Then I rest.

The world of words and letters continues to beckon me. There are fewer rights or wrongs here. Yes, there is spelling, grammar, wording and proper decorum to guide me. But I am accountable only to myself. Perhaps this is the reason I prefer to write for pleasure rather than trying to please and appease an audience &/or editor.

I believe I have been drawn to fulfill my "calling" my whole life.

Originally, I was drawn to child care (starting out with dog care and graduating to children when I was old enough) because that was the only employment available to me before I turned sixteen. This not only provided an income but started honing my abilities to work with and for people.

Next, I worked the service industry (an ice cream kiosk, followed by Pizza Hut) where I experienced the cause and effect of good customer service.

I started working in the banking industry during my Pizza Hut years which helped me appreciate providing customer service while dealing with people's bank accounts was a far cry from dealing with someone who received the wrong pizza.

My banking career was often supplemented by weekend employment of a non-numbers nature. Eventually my full time focus turned to running a daycare, which was subsized by Saturday employment at a financial institution, which in turn was followed by working part time as a bookkeeper. In time, bookkeeping progressed to a full time commitment.

The evolution from bookkeeper to "substitute secretary" for the school board was the hardest transition of all. Rules which sounded black and white became every shade of gray, pink and blue under the sky. Not having a right/wrong; true/false; cross checked and balanced to zero answer was my undoing. A second job was a requirement. There was no regularity to my schedule and I had to make myself available seven days a week.

I felt like I was walking against the current throughout that entire year.

I literally came home again when I reopened my daycare which coincided perfectly with the offer of a weekend bookkeeping job. I was my own boss again. I was walking with the current, doing what I did best. I was back in my comfort zone child tending, self employment, writing for some papers and bookkeeping on the side.

Nothing ever stays the same.

I closed my daycare. My resignation from column writing came about during that same period. Life was shifting and changing under my feet. These were uncertain times but they have brought me today. And today, I am exactly where I am meant to be. For now.

I have two, part time jobs which equal "one". I am bookkeeper, hear me calculate! I am a care provider, feel me care. Either one of these jobs alone would be too much and not enough at the same time.

I believe we are all craving a sense of balance throughout our lives. Life is always evolving so there is always a sense of feeling the need to brace oneself for the inevitable change that is headed our way whether we plan for it or not.

As I look back, I can remember the feeling when my sense of balance was off. I made changes when and where necessary. When I was unable to change the circumstance I would endeavor to try to change my perspective and try to make the best of the situation at hand.

Of course none of this is as simple as it sounds. It is the places "in between" that are tough to figure out while you are in the trenches walking the walk. I am ever thankful for each and every time I find a safe place to land and assess the situation while I'm living it.

Today, I am simply taking a break from the accounting end of things. I am appreciating the view from the plateau I have reached. I cannot ignore the feeling that life-as-I-know-it could change in an instant. But now? Right now? I am just going to breathe deeply and inhale this moment.

Maybe I should do a little more than inhale the moment. The only calculator I am drawn to at the moment is a "calorie calculator" which has explained that my current rate of eating minus my current rate of under activity results in a 2 pound a week weight gain.

There is a mathematical explanation for almost anything. Sigh ... I knew I wanted to take a math holiday.