Choose Your Own Adventure

Does anyone remember the "Choose Your Own Adventure" books? Books where the story would take you to a fork in the road and you got to choose one of a few options, then turn to the page where that particular choice took you to the next story line. You would get to another place in the plot and choose again. I can't remember how many times you got to choose your own adventure but the fun was to go back and choose other options to see how the story would end when you chose a different path.

I woke up this morning feeling like I had just reached the end of my very own "choose your own adventure" book. I have been thinking and rehashing my marriage, the choices I made, the path I followed, the outcomes due to those choices, reflecting on where I am and grateful to be at the end of this path unscathed and with healthy family relationships in place.

I rewound the book of my life and think of how things may have gone if I had made the choice to stay within the confines of my marriage.

No matter which way I unfold the plot, I cannot find a happy ending. I see heart ache and pain. I feel severed relationships. I cannot fathom a better outcome than our present day existence. I have tried. But I can't see any better path than the one which I followed ... a path made clear when Dad died while I was on maternity leave from work and literally packing up and moving away from the scene of my past was a viable option which unfolded with ease.

I woke up this morning wondering if I had lived this life before and each time I learned what I needed to know, to take me to the exact spot I'm at right now. A place where I know I am exactly where I am meant to be. Harmonious relationships, a safe home, a solid foundation and nestled into a quietly comfortable life I wouldn't trade for all the tea in China (bad example - I don't like tea ... but you get my point).

I wouldn't trade this life for anything in the world. I am so sorry for relationships which were lost along the way. But I truly feel it had to happen this way to get to where we are today.

Today I'm standing on the other side of where I was before this particular adventure provided the fork in the road that led us to today. I am hopeful some relationships which were damaged along the way may be mended.

One fork in the road at a time, opting for a choice that may take you exactly where you are meant to be ... choose your own adventure and enjoy the ride.